I wana cry. I want a hug.

Perfect.

Please sing to me,
I can see you open up to breathe.
Fast words make it easier on me,
Make a point to never disappoint you,
Somebodies got to tell me what to do.
Just wish you would've seen me
When it used to come so easy.
I like to say it's easy to stay
But it's not for me,
Cause I'm barely here at all.

Slow down now, the secrets out.
And I swear now everything is perfect.
What you want, what you need has been killing me.
Try to be everything that you want me to be.
I say yes, I'll undress, I'll do more for less.
Now I'll change everything until it's perfect again.

Coming down, coming around,
Giving a frown to the sound when I hit ground.
I hate the way that I say I should say
When I know that I don't give a fuck about it anyway.
Shake hands, and shoot smiles all around,
As I sell my body by the pounds.
Sign my name on the dotted line,
It would be fate, to not recessitate.

Slow down now, the secrets out.
And I swear now I'll still make this perfect.
What you want, what you need has been killing me.
Try to be everything that you want me to be.
I say yes, I'll undress, I'll do more for less.
Now I'll change everything till it's perfect again.

I think it's better this way,
This is good in a better way.
It's better this way.
I'll make this perfect again.
I'll make this perfect again.

What you want, what you need has been killing me.
And I will change everything you want me to be.
I say yes, I'll undress, I'll do more for less.
Now I'll change everything, woah yeah.
What you want, what you need has been killing me.
Try to be everything that you want me to be.
I say yes, I'll undress, I'll do more for less.
Now I'll change everything, I'll make this perfect again.

can we stay together forever ?

* warning : totally random *

hmph.... >_<

m eating like a pig. n i still eat without thinking that im actually expanding.

i think im insomniac. hahaha. no but i quite think i am.

bio is actually fun lah. pls exam end quickly.

cant i be with u all the time ?

can i have cakes all the time ?

i need the usb cable.

what if it is true ? what if i said it bcuz i just said it n not based on myself ?

what if im still hungry ?

what if il forever be stuck in this moment ?

what if its not okay ?

what if i cant wait ?

cuti ni nak buat apa. risau coz nanti emo xtau nak buat apa.

kalo bole nak kluar selalu, xmo duduk rumah.

what if u dont call anymore ? what if u forget about me ?

i find it hard to breathe thanks to the lovely, such lovely phlegm.

i enjoy listening music loudly.

i hate my throbbing throat.

i want to eat again.

i want icecreammmmmm !

i do wish i can go for jamming n concerts.

sometimes, everything seems pretty much overrated.

im scared to believe. but i do believe. bcuz theres ntg more to believe.

im not perfect. but i do wish i am perfect.

i do wish im invincible. its easier that way.

are we getting along well ?

are u happy ? are u happy enough ?

what would u do if somone were to jump of a cliff ?

what would u do if i were to say hi ?

arrrrrrrrrrrrr....................................

mcm dengan toottt sajaaa. malas aku nak layan.

everyone is like

oh, ur suppose to study aiman.

UR SUPPOSE TO STUDY.

OHH FUCK OFF !

i cant help but to realize that i do look quite pale today.

Stupid. I dont know what to do. Oh my god.

no seriously, oh my god.

i do feel miserable but in a way im smiling coz i find it cute n i can imagine how things would be like.

and in a way, i know u more. tho it may just be me assuming things, yet again, but il have a few options in hand, =)

i dont know what im saying.

^_^

Jom post gmbq byk2. Hehehe

im not studying. not good.

this is cute. hahah

deeper conversation

Is your favourite colour blue?
Do you always tell the truth?
Do you believe in outerspace?
And I'm learning you

Is your skin as tanned as mine?
Does your hair flow sideways?
Did someone took a portion of your heart?
And I'm learning you

And if you don't mind
Can you tell me
All your hopes and fears
And Everything that you believe in
Would you make a difference in the world
I'd love for you to take me to a deeper conversation
Only you can make me

I let my guard down for you
And in time you will too

If you don't mind
Can you tell me
All your hopes and fears
And Everything that you believe in
Would you make a difference in the world
I'd love for you to take me to a deeper conversation
Only you can make me

air supply --> its you ! haha

so mula2, id like to go to sleep after this. i dont feel so good. gah. bila la nak baekkk....

okehhh. so my mum was like jom p tgk concert. i was liek spa ? shes like air supply. yeah i laughed la kan. hahah. i pnah la dgq kewujudan air supply. yeah dpa mcm zmn bee gess beatles kot. hahaha. but idont mind la. mmg not my type tapi yg penting i fkr, i get to spend time with her. bila lagi nk spend kan. i got only a year left. pastuh msti jrg2 la balek umah.

n its nice when u get to see ur parents doing stuff that they like. no3 minus my dad n his hutan rimba kannn. haha i like him being with cars n pegi those exhibition n stuffs. n my mum shopping or simply hang dgn kawan dia ka. its just entah nice for me n makes me smile.

ada skali tu, yea went dating ngn dady, hahah. oh hari dmam tu.. sooo just the thing he said ah yea t kat sna bole la dia lepak2 by the beach, drink teh tarik smbel bca paper. n then u can come n visit me. m like =( n terdiam sat lah. i cant join him lepak dah. i cant join my parents pegi by the beach n have cendol together. how sad is thatttt.

entah a. i know mmg dari dluuuu lgi i ckp the further i can go, the better. but rite now, i just dont wna go. i dont wana go anywere. i just wna stay here ! rite here in sungai petani. hmph. at least now someone made me feel like staying. gave me a reason to stay. thank u for that. but no thank u, coz bcuz of u i dont wana go away. hahah.

so, yeah. the nicest thing rite now is just staying home. lepak2 with parents. dang. xsukalah. like going away n further studies pa suma.

i know2. study aiman study. i m very mls.

n im scared im giving my mum a reason to say no to coupling. i have to admit, no its not about the coupling. its me. i yang malas. n i yang dok batuk xhenti2 la an. yeah i can use sick as an excuese. i am btw. haha. trying to. so yeah, i screwed the other paper, theres still another one. so god willing, m gona work my ass off n not screw the other paper thattt muchhh. adeh. just dont flunk truk sudah. gah !

i want icecreammmm ~ hmph >_<

btw,,,,,,, cuti ni kannnn,,,,,,, nak buat apaaaa ????

feeling congested is not nice either.

shit laa. im only at chapter three chem. n crawling. like. literally.

kenapa susah sgt aku nk fhm chem ! at least i do better with phy la kan.

mole la pa benda la. pdhl benda tu simple gla2. yea id skip the calculations part. i really just dont get it. at least phy phm gak. tp bnda sma jarrrr. its depan mata. igt formula, tau sudah, bole la wat. yea but the thing is i know bnda mmg bkan dpan mata. u got to go like the roundabout way bru lah dpt. the thing is, aku mmg jnis bole wat yg dpan mata ja. inside the box. outside the box, id passsss ~ so i dont know how to deal with the calculations n whatnot.

haih. so. sad. la. wey.

perhaps i should get some sleep. or sth to poke my throat n dig it out.

rawr ?

bodo arrrr.

nak jugakkkk ~

okayyyy. im sneezing again.

n i choked on my vitamin c. hahah.

hai.syo.

wey3! jom bertunang! haha. gila ckit jar.

aisyo. i feel bad. lieing. haha. but xpa2. lieing utk kebaikan is okkk. i thinkkk. i mean seriously, even, if u drag me there, n i hate it n i dont even wna be there, it aint gona do any good to me !

the english paper wasnt depressing. section a nya essay tu aku xtau bpa puloh kali da aku wat dlm hidup. haha. addmths was ha. ha. ha. aku dpt 10 markh pun ckup bgoih arrr. i gave up so fast. i knw i cud like perahkn my otak try merapu but i was like so sleepy, dgn rsa xsihat, so i was like lantak a n p tdoq. heheh. i spent two hours of coughing. gah !

i prefer just saying n asking n telling anything thats in my mind. its better that way.

btw2, nak dooodolls !

n2 u know its so furry n nice n soft. hehe.

n btw. aku nk p study chem.

n btw i really hate coughing.

n btw i think i overslept.

n btw its been awhile since i sat beside u n lepak with u.

n btw bila.la.nak.abes.exam.

!_!

the streets

im bored. im bored. im bored.

im hungry. haha.

n im only at stats. well, ok la tu. hopefulyyyyy, esok bole la jawab. god willing.

i could be staring at u for hours, n yet, i wont get bored n i want to stare at u more. haha.

n kerana exam, i cant go to penang tis weekend. hmph. but yeah time deepavali kna p. ^_^

next week is gona be another shitty week. since suma science subs an. awat aku msok sc tahh.

n yeah seriously, cuti ni, i really have to do sth bout my life. my studies. n future plans. pergh ! i dont like growing up.

wey i like tis faizal tahir song. hahah. weirddd.

time aku nganga kan sometimes, this thing would pop out. it says.

what have i gotten myself into ?

yeahhhh ~

it is kinda true sometimes.

ive never screwed my accounts this bad. i didnt study sej like errr at all la jgak. ^_^ abes2 exam tadi, i was just like oh dang. yeah stayed away from ppl, xmo ckp, xmo apa. mcm sial.

n i spent an hour coughing n an hour sleeping. gah ! xsukerrrr ~

so yeah. m happier right now coz i diddd sleep a bit n boleyh study addmaths. ^_^ with the right songs. weeee.

I HATE TO BE FORCED TO DO THINGS.

NO FORCED XPA, NI SURO P.

=.=

p.ja.lah.

oh n. even if im at the edge of the cliff, n im about to jump, i dont feel like telling u coz i dont want u to know.

oh n im denying sth. but nahh. overcome it aiman. control it aiman

^_^

Shit. M gonna fail my acc n sej. I didnt get up. Haha.

Hence~ i didnt study.

i hate coughing

ok. get this.

complete, nice n comfy sleep = 4/4

my sleep nowadays = 2/4 or 1/4

so its either coz im coughing or just simply i cant sleep. its not that i cant sleep. im just not sleepy at all. so yeap, my penyakit susah nak tido datang menyerang balek. aisyo.

n thennn. i dont know how. but il try to get in bab 5, 7, 8, 9. by. tonight. haha. anyways, bukan boleh tido ponn. n i didnt. start. a. thing. crap.

n omg. seriously rasa cm nak kluarkan ja my throat. gah.

n. oh. mai. gat. hahahah. ^_^ u could just slap my face tadi pgi, or maybe thruout the whole day n il just end up saying ily coz really, i dont care. hhaha. i wasa like smiling mcm org gila. yes call me psycho. i was. =D gahhhh. yeah its good. ^_^

bm aaaa. bodo arr. yeah dpt2 paper i ws like bodo ar, bodo, bodo, bodo. hahah. i cudnt do it. mcm blank gla2 babi. blur trok arrr. otak p mna xtauuu. but i tried n tried n tried n i thinkkkk i did pertyyyy okayyy. so i hope its cool.

esok aaa. accounts mcm dah gone.

i m bored.

i have to study.

>_<

Relax aiman relax~

Firstly, i dont know what i shud feel. I dont wana sit for the finals. Haha. The end.

I find it fuckingly yea fuckingly hard to focus n concentrate. Pa bnda aku bca pun xtau. Nk kta aku daydream ka angau xdak pun. M jz plain lazy. Coz mood study tu xmai. The urgency the need to study. Or the hand that slaps me on my face xdtg lagi n yell n ckp aiman study la!

N im irritatingly coughing. Like selalu. Adess. Gah

n then yeah m worried. Xtau la esok nk jwb cna. My brain. Is. Not. Functioning. Ades.

So nak headbang pun cm xdk mood a. Coz mls sgtttt. Haha.

Awat jd cmni pun aku xtau arrrr. Gah.

The only happy thot is ywa of coz friends n ^_^ hehehe. At last, itl be in my hands.

That should really lift me up n make me feel like as if im flying. N hope to knock some sense in my brain so then i can do my bm essays well. Gah!

Relax aiman relax. Just crap all u want tomorrow. Its just. Twoo. Simpleee. Bmmm. Papers. Which u have plentyyyyy of timeee to crap.

I need all the luck n help anybody can ever get. Haha

it. will. be. okay.

Bullshit. Otak mcam satu pa benda pun xstudy. Argh!

i have. to stop. COUGHING.

the sweetest surprise ~

"If you don't run your own life, somebody else will."

"You were not born a winner, and you were not born a loser. You are what you make yourself be."

Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction.

If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were.

"When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us."

"When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all up hill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up though the pace seems slow--
You may succeed with another blow,
Success is failure turned inside out--
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit."

( benda ni i had to hafal dgn akmal time skola rendah, kena bca dkat perhimpunan. hahaha! )

"If I am not for myself, who will be for me?
If I am not for others, what am I?
And if not now, when?"

"Do one thing every day that scares you." - muahahha

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

-so yes, dont regret lahhh.

* inilah akibat drpd study bm yang xmsok pa2 pun for like almost an hour. n nak tido tp xleyh tido. gah. weyh3. esok finals wey. hahaha! n aku xstudy pa2 weyh. sej satu pa xsentuh.syok ! *

i have the craziest feeling ever. i would like my mum to send me to school right now. haha

'Cause the spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit perfectly

The stars lean down to kiss you
And I lie awake and miss you
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere

'Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'd send a postcard to you, dear
'Cause I wish you were here

I'll watch the night turn light-blue
But it's not the same without you
Because it takes two to whisper quietly

The silence isn't so bad
'Til I look at my hands and feel sad
'Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly

I'll find repose in new ways
Though I haven't slept in two days
'Cause cold nostalgia
Chills me to the bone

But drenched in vanilla twilight
I'll sit on the front porch all night
Waist-deep in thought because
When I think of you I don't feel so alone

I don't feel so alone, I don't feel so alone

As many times as I blink
I'll think of you tonight
I'll think of you tonight

When violet eyes get brighter
And heavy wings grow lighter
I'll taste the sky and feel alive again

And I'll forget the world that I knew
But I swear I won't forget you
Oh, if my voice could reach
Back through the past
I'd whisper in your ear
Oh darling, I wish you were here

bc. thank u.

Hey, u wanna play a game?

I still dont quite get it.

Oh shooot! Aku terrrrtengok sth that i shudnt tgk. Y oh whyyy~

Gila btulll. I shud see moreee! Haha. Thts suicide i tell u.

Btw2! I cant wait to have it in my hands n to be able to hug it to sleep. =D! Sukaaa~

I diddd study bm n acc. I wud like to say, may God bless me n my sejrh paper.

N dangg. So sad esok xp skolaa. Xpa. Patience. ^_^

It. Takes. Time. So. Just. Wait.

N. I. Need. A. Delete. Button.

Oh n yes, i need u to also get out of my fucking face. No its

GET OUT OF MY FUCKING LIFE.

Thank u. ^_^

hidup kenalah selalu ceria ~

looking back, i was like, i must have just totally lost my mind. hehehe. i seriously did la. mesti byk org kata, aiman ni gla ka pa ? i have to admit, i was.

itulah org ckp. sikap ingin tahu, ingin cuba, ingin rasa kamu itu akan membinasakaan diri kamu. haha. well, i have to agree. its so true. so kalau benda tu meragukan, n mcm xptot, n mmg bkan keperluan dlm hidup, xpayahlah gedik nak p cuba. its not worth it pun. dont. waste. ur. precious. teenage. life.

n alhamdulillah, i feel better now. heeee. keja dok sweat jaa. gah. n id grab any freaking chance to bathe again. haha. nikmat mandi tau dakkk ~

im bored actually. tgh merepek smbel tunggu mood nk study. m gona start with acc. yeah tadi nak start, n i was like, oh shit, i got no books ! haha. so yes. its kinda cool n nice actually jalan dkat kwsn skola, pdhl ur not suppose to be there. haha. n okeee. i miss school. msok2 klass tgk tmpat duduk suma m like haih. i miss em.

cough2. sneeze2. laugh2.

relaxxxxx ~ ^__^ senyum selalu.

And I'm doing just fine
I'm always landing on my feet,
In the nic of time,
Something by the skin of my teeth
I ain't gonna stress
Cause the worst ain't happened yet
Somethings watching over me like Sweet Serendipity

^_^

Having running nose isnt a nice thing also. I feel like taking out my nose. Haha

ok. What i want right now

i wana go shopping. Money-no limit. Hahaha. Wana get new jeans, baju byk2, cardis, n shoes. Converse n girly lkke kk.

N then i want selendangs alsoo.

N then i want icecreammm. Baskin robbins or vanetta or magnum. Awt kt skola xjuai magnummm~

I wish i have a microchip. In it, all sorts of data. Form one till form four knowldge. N it has to be installed IN my brain. N be able to produce good quality answers.

Oh. Crap.

=) haihhh

pink, sometimes, its a joke to me.

ok3. im very well aware that its pink. hahah. did i ever tell u that i do wish to be colourful at times? even my dressing. yeaah.... spookyyyy ~

ok id like to say that im not goin to school tomorow. i must recover by tonight. huhu. so then esok the whole day i can study kkk. n god willing, il be ok on monday n il go to school. n some lil surprise2 which im dieing to know. hi hi hi . if i cant make it, tuesday lah. haiyoo. do u know, curiousity kills the cat. i wish i can strangle u !

n if u wna see me at my worst, come n see me right now. hahah. dgn so serabut n xok nyaa. gah

n no i dont seem to be studying. satu pa xmsokkk ~ saket ati btullls ~ last minute study jgakk.

so bek tgk tv ka texting ka lena ka.

ok so this. what else have u been doing besides sleeping ?

the answer is SLEEPING ~ adoiiii

n yeah. the reason y m blogging here is bcuz. yeahh.

how do u pay ur parents back ? mmg duet n all. but i think money really doesnt matter when ur parents are loaded. well kita bg pun, sejuk ati dpa. the main thing that i saw which makes them happy is ur results. ur exam results. i know my parents were very happy about it. n i felt entah. very happy too la of coz. n another thing. u getting married. i know2, m sixteen, but i did give it a thought anyways. haha.. parents akan seronok gla if tau ur gona get engaged n married n whatnot. n u being successful. n being happy. n yeah share things with em. n not mess things up.n just show that yeah u can do sth. n ur worth sth. n just make them happy.

=)

sorry. i know i crap a lott.

n2, i keep saying no asking myself. why this, why that ? why alottt of stufff...

Its realllyyy a bad idea to actually fall sick at times like this.
=_= hmph

hiyaaaa !

i love his voiceeee ~

teeheee.

macam gilaa kamoooo ~

mula2. i find it very hard to open my eyes. secondly, i feel like my head is being squashed in between addmaths n sejarah books. no really i do feel it being squashed n it also means that i hve to study. gahh ~

nak telan pon sketttt. but u knoww. my appetite is still awesome. haha

my dads like i heard ur not well. what did u do ? have u been kissing someone ?
m like =.=' yeah perhaps.

i m so blurr rite nowww ~ huhuhu

kalo aku da study suma xpa, ni pa pun xlagiii. i wna cryyyyyy ~ aku emotional jgak later.

fiinal year la weyhhh. haha. xpa2. i can make it thru. ^_^ !

n i wish im a bitttt taller so then i dont look as if im drowned in the white cardi. huhu. its lawa i think. just im too small. hmph !

study.aiman.study.

=((

if it means a lot to you

Hey darling, I hope you're good tonight
And I know you don't feel right when I'm leaving
Yeah, I want it but no, I don't need it
Tell me something sweet to get me by
'Cause I can't come back home 'til they're singin'

La, la la la, la la la
'Til everyone is singin'

If you can wait 'til I get home
Then I swear to you that we can make this last
If you can wait 'til I get home
Then I swear come tomorrow, this will all be in our past
It might be for the best

Hey sweetie, I need you here tonight
And I know that you don't wanna be leaving
Yeah, you want it but I can't help it
I just feel complete when you're by my side
But I know you can't come home 'til they're singin'

La, la la la, la la la
'Til everyone is singin'
La, la la la, la la la

If you can wait 'til I get home
Then I swear to you that we can make this last
If you can wait 'til I get home
Then I swear come tomorrow, this will all be in our past
It might be for the best

You know you can't give me what I need
And even though you mean so much to me
I can wait through everything
Is this really happening?
I swear I'll never be happy again
And don't you dare say we can just be friends
I'm not some boy that you can sway
We knew it'd happen eventually

If you can wait 'til I get home
Then I swear we can make this last

long. distance.

kenapa dlu when i was.... i didnt think twice about this matter?

but rite now, when im .... i just entah. i langsung xmau pegi. i hate it even.

yeah. nobody said its gona be easy. nobody said its gona be simple.

even if i suit his taste, n he suites my taste. n we totally understand each other. cool with each other. nobody said we r gona go thru a well oh so perfect life.

i do know for a fact, im not gona give up. n im not gona let go. but to not think much, n be safe. just follow the flow. ^_^

i did give it a thought, but yea its not bugging me now.well it does a bit.but itl totally bug me after spm. or nak dkat2 a. rarrr.

psepa laaaa. kalo hbq time2 form two xpa gak. ni ades.

why am i totally wasting my time looking at these stufffssss ??

i like this toooo...


ada lampu mlm2 sgtlah besstt.


wey3. haha


besnya kalo cmniiii ~

SAKAI - TRIST. ( need one ? )

and sooo.. my dad laughed when he heard i got the post. haha. i did too. seriously, how on earth la kan. but then yeah, tcer ckp coz team work n stuff. n so, okkk, im opting for bowling ok. swimming tu biarkan saja la. bcuz i have to. tho itl be sucky, but yeah m not gonna bowl. il be there bcuz i have to be there, n il help out n do stuff. n after that, im off window shopping ka shopping ka or secret recipe. sorang2 pun aku sanggup. so then jiwa xterseksa.

n yeah seems like next year xle la malas2. haha. i have to find a club to join n at least attend every fortnight. gah ! when la can i drivee. xyah la susahkan parents sgt. n yeh. mcm terpksa active ja dalam kokurikulum. n thennn studies lagi. ttn g. keja umah g. syokk !

no i havent really studiied yet. great. riteeeee ~

n then bekalan movies xcukup. ok that totally worries me. gah !

can i like go out every weekend later time cuti ? i mean since il be staying home every weekday annnn.. so it doesnt hurt kannn ~ or just dump me at vmal la. that should be gooddd.

pehtu annn. yea i find it stressful well not sometimes but everyday. being in class. hahaha. dok sat2 xpla. ni dgn xle text. no games. ppl here there bising. nak wat kja or dok sengap2 dgn tenang or sumbat telinga n nk wt kja dgn tenang xle. not forgetting annooyiinngg ones yg aku cam nak sepak jarrr. doihh ~

arini arrr. emo ada. epy ada. i have to go thru those two everydayy. but anyways. nobody cares if im miserable. so might as well be happy. ^_^

n i had two icecreams today. n im getting fatter by the minute. no. joke.

mums like tu la. pipi bsaq sgt. makan ggg. - i cant help but to eat a lot okeee. oh n sleep. i sleep n eat more than i talk to ppl. gah -

study.aiman.study

i kinda like it.

nak yang niiii...

i do wana have a corner where i can paste2 stuff n whatnot.. hee

so its like white. n then with bright colours. mcm besss.

ni lagiii besssttt. save lotsa space.

But now I understand that even if I was blind I could have clearly seen

I said, I saw it coming
Where did you see it?
Where did you see it?

Why are you panting baby?
Is it to hard to keep up with what you said?

From the outskirts of common sense
this is extremely uncommon.
So many lights ahead, if only we kept our eyes open.

But now I understand that even if I
was blind I could have clearly seen
how filthy you really are.

Sure.

It would have been an excellent story,
but I had to get up off the train.
Get up, jump off with me,
hold my hand and I'll explain everything.

If only it was that easy story teller
Would you mind never speaking to me again?
I would like for you to remain a myth.
(close the book burn it up)

Tell me another lie, That it's all going to be ok,
Eating up every word you say, It's starting to taste good.

I haven't heard one thing you have said
this whole time you were talking
I was to busy picturing you dead.

I thought you would be and everything you thought
I thought before it and everything
You were up-beat
I was thinking that but i looked you in the eyes
And you were an optical illusion
And that I wanted to strangle you

Strangle you so you would choke and bleed
Bleeding out
I didn't want to see it
But I had to see it
...That because you enjoyed the pleasures
The pleasures as much as i enjoyed the pleasures
...Killing you
I want to kill you
Because you're an illusion
Amen
Amen
You said that before
You said you believe in Christ
OH MY GOD)

If I were to end abruptly,
would it leave you wanting more? (x5)

you. bloody. bastard. ^_^

If this were a contract i wouldn't sign

Look! he drank straight from the faucet!
HOLY SHIT HE'S FUCKIN LOST IT!
We only enjoy fine sparkling water!
FED SOMETHING ADHESIVE TO YOUR DAUGHTER!

Called me old-fashioned,but I think trains kick ass!
I don't need hot wheels to get to class!

What the hell is wrong with him!?
HIS HIS HAIRS SO LONG IT NEEDS A TRIM!
I heard he packs a lot in those bloomers,
IT'S PROBABLY TRUE LIKE ALL THE OTHER RUMORS!

You think you're modern,
But that taste won't last (It just won't last)
And everything you own,
Will be (Will be)...
The fucking past. (the fucking past)

Cynicism save me.
Turn me around and march me back up the sidewalk to my
door.
Take me back inside and throw my trench-coat on the
floor.
Lead me back into my bedroom,
And make me put my cloths back on.

Grab the Mag-Lite, get the grappling hook,
Lets fine the bottom of this cave and close the book!

The salt on my lips is an enzyme,
That metabolizes reality,
To fuel these dirty delusions!
You're leading me to these CONCLUSIONS!
The organs exploding, IN MY TORSO!
Like a series of city blocks,
Giving in to a nuclear blast.

And now my pressure relief valve is activated;
Maybe I should stop holding my breath.
I'll prove it, Come sit next to me.
Tell me what you do at work;
You half-hearted intimacy.
We'll be like gay actors,
Over and out,
Having the kind of sex sacrificial virgins,
Fantasize about.

But if I knew your name it would have to be for
charity!
JUST TRY ME! TEST ME! RELEASE ME!

Cynicism reassure me that,
If we only had less clothing and better light.
It would all just be an embarrassing misunderstanding.
The sudden silences, aren't the crash,
Where lips should be.

If this were a contract i wouldn't sign

dragging the moisture from the air, i am so dry.

i wish i have more cakes. esok beli g. ^_^ maybe2.

i wish i have a remote control.

nak bantal buchukkkk ~ mmmmmm. >_<

thats all i want, for now, i guess.

because i dont wna think about it. even hear about it. even know about it.

i just want that bantal. thats all.

its hard to get tho. haha

WTFWJD!

Have you ever heard a thunder bolt voice your name?
Lets all just reach our hands into the dark,
And feel what reaches back!
I stopped subscribing to you a long time ago,
But I still see you, every fucking day!

Don't get the octopus upset,
It may eat itself!
If only we could grow back our privileges.
Tunnel vision (If only i could touch your face again!)
I am not sleeping;
I'm only resting my eyes,
I'm only resting my eyes!

I didn't think that air could scream in resistance,
Until you, approached me protesting your advancement,
Don't walk any closer, don't you dare, walk any closer!
I forgot who you were...

"game over"

A dinner party, a last chance,
A love song, a bear dance.
Raising tension on your rhythmic pounding,
I knew you were scared!
Didn't think that i would play dead.
Next time come to class fully prepared.

Reply to my lines like we practiced earlier today.
Oh common don't be shy!
They'll applause to anything you have to say!

I spy YOU SPY! with my little eye.
That the desert you've deserted is a little dry.

Dragging the moisture from the air,
I am so dry... Let me get a sip of what you
Want me to say! I am so thirsty!

Dragging the moisture from the air.
I am so dry...

=_=' i will kill you.

Wooot wooot ^_^

You make me happy whether you know it or not
We should be happy, that's what I said from the start
I am so happy knowing you are the one
That I want for the rest of my days, for the rest of my days
Through all of my days

You're looking so cool, you're looking so fly
I can't deny that when I'm staring you down right dead in the eye
I wanna try to be the person you want
The person you need, it's hard to conceive
That somebody like you could be with someone like me

I'm happy knowing that you are mine
The grass is greener on the other side
The more I think, the more I wish
That we could lay here for hours and just reminisce
Uh, oh, oh

You're looking so fresh, it's catching my eye
Why oh, why did I not see this before
The girl I adore was right in front of me
And now I'll take a step back and look in your eye
And ask why it took so long to see we're meant to be

I'm happy knowing that you are mine
The grass is greener on the other side
The more I think, the more I wish
That we could lay here for hours and just reminisce

On the good, the bad, the ugly
The smiles, the laughs, the funny
Or all the things we put each other through
It's for you, for you, for you

You make me happy whether you know it or not
We should be happy, that's what I said from the start
I am so happy knowing you are the one
That I want for the rest of my days, for the rest of my days

I'm happy knowing that you are mine
The grass is greener on the other side
The more I think, the more I wish
That we could lay here for hours and just reminisce

Ur hawtttt~ hahaha

Ok2. Mula2 id like to thank God for all the wonderdul things i have. =)

Soooo. Yes m like hyper n happy tday. Mulla2 x n then i ws lke laaa crapp. Hee.

So3. U wna know who is my second bf?

He

he

he.

Hihihihihi~

*drum rolls*

CAKE!!!!

Ok yea i love it so much. It can jz totally make me go gaga n like rawrrr. Proof. 1am yes 1AM this mrng i typed in secret recipe cakes on my google image search. Haha. So u can see how desperate n nuts i was. I mean yeaaaa i slept thruout the day n mls gla nk study. Gahhh. So yea wish granted. I had like arr stwberry yoghurt ciz? Or yoghurt strawberry ciz? Idk la all i knw its sdap. Haha. I know m totaly making myself fat. Anywayss~

I just love food. ^_^ !

N yes i love the sound of guitars, pianos n drums. Yes they r music to my ears. ^_^

n i love ppl who smell good. Hahah.

Oh n yea.

Skinny ppl dont pupu.
Skinny ppl are mean.
Skinny ppl xpuas ati dgn kegembiraan fat pll.
Ok so fat pll r lazy.
Fat ppl r blind.
Fat ppl r kind tho. Haha

skinny ppl- anis n ezza
fat ppl - me n nusha.

^_^ so see how crappy i was tadi. N not forgetting i started waving at bdak2 form two an n was luffing my ass off.

All i can say is, i like today. M happy. =)

I would do anything just to get a secret recipe cake right nowww! GAH!

ones ability

isnt it ironic ? i mean. just think.

a sight of certain someone. it can either make ur day, make ur heart beats super fast n u start loosing control. or all of a sudden it ruins ur day n hits ur boiling point. n u start cursing. or u can have this warm feeling n make u smile. or u can have a feeling of wanting more. or a feeling to go to that person, n burry ur face on that persons chest, n just cry. or ul just simply feel like ur floating.

a person can tear u down. a person can push u off the cliff n expects u to die. break ur heart. change ppls perspective towards u. make u loose confidence over almost everything. loose faith n trust. can make u feel miserable at best. restless. hatred. anger. useless. stupid. idiotic. worthless. make u give up on life n say pls kill me. make u go on riot. make u pout. make u feel insecure. a person can make u cry instantly. a person can make u feel as if ur stuck at that stupid moment.

a person can make u happy. a person can calm u down when ur angry. can say its ok even if its not. a person can make sure that it will be ok. can regain ur confidence. can regain ur trust. has the guts to do it. can be sure about sth n believes in it. can bring ur normalself back. the u that u used to be. can make u feel safe. make u feel secure. make u feel that theres ntg else to worry about. make u feel free. make u feel so lucky. make u feel complete. a person can make u get back on track. back standing on ur two feet. n kick ppls ass !

a person can say or do things that ul remember for life. be it happy or not. even if u dont want to remember it. yes there are parts which i wish i can erase. i need it to be erased.

i have to. i have to get up. again. like it or not. i mustnt be thinking about it. i shudnt be. i shudnt give a damn about it. why should i rite?

i have everything i need rite here, rite now. i have my awesome parents. i have nice siblings. i have super duper nice friends/family. n my 'special friend' ^_^

i shudnt be wasting my time on matters like that. i didnt create it anyways.

- total crap, sorry. haha. just felt like saying how ppl around u can totally affect u. how they can change u. whether u want it or u like it, it happens. which in a day, like today. during the day time, i can say its bullshit. but then later at night, i feel so good. ^_^ -

Am I that worthless? Am I that bad as a person?

dude. what are u effingly staring at ? im not naked. u have issues with me ? ok. come up to me n tell me whats ur problem. dont stare at me like that. i didnt practically kill anyone ~

Stop being in your friggin cloud and get real.

oh yes it tires me to the bloody core. ^_^ physically and mentally.

if i am given a chance to do sth, i would. and i wish i can.

and im not the only one.

and im not the only one in it.

n yeah. blah.blah.blah.

do u realize that ?

i cant wait for school to end. tho il be bored to death, i dont really wana care right now.

sometimes, certain ppl shouldnt be put into situations like that.

yeah. sth that ur good at. making ppls life miserable. kudos. n the beauty of it is u dont even realize it. ur really not aware of anything.

but then again.

the worst aint happened yet. ^_^

This is the latest ive stayed up for like er this week?

Nak study lagii. Xmo tido. Xmengantuk punn.

Otak sja xberfungsii. Aiyoo. Theres sth tht i havee to do when im studying that keeps me going. Gah!

I call it stupid. Haha

sometyms,in certain cases, its best not to listen to urself, but to others. Which i didnt follow today. N i partly regretted it.

Think before you leap ~

x. sukenyer. mood. swings.

hmph. >_<

sweet serendipity -heart-

I ain't got no car
And I got one pair of jeans
They've been stretched too far
Now they're weak at the seams
I can't say what's next
And I got nothing up my sleeve
But I don't lose my head
Cause it ain't really up to me

And I'm doing just fine
I'm always landing on my feet,
In the nic of time,
Something by the skin of my teeth
I ain't gonna stress
Cause the worst ain't happened yet
Somethings watching over me like Sweet Serendipity

Oh, oh, oh oh oh, ohhhhhhh!
Sweet Serendipity
Oh, oh, oh oh oh, ohhhhhhh!

I don't ask for a lot
Nothing more than I need
Cause I love what I got
Don't need to play no lottery
I just wanna be strong
Happy end of the road
I don't want to hold on
I want the strength to let go

And I'm doing just fine
I'm always landing on my feet,
In the nic of time,
Something by the skin of my teeth
I ain't gonna stress
Cause the worst ain't happened yet
Somethings watching over me like Sweet Serendipity

And what will be will be, in the nic of time,
Something by the skin of my teeth
I ain't gonna stress
Cause the worst ain't happened yet
Somethings watching over me like Sweet Serendipity

Oh, oh, oh oh oh, ohhhhhhh!
Sweet Serendipity
Oh, oh, oh oh oh, ohhhhhhh!
Now Sweet Serendipity

Don't look fate can only find you
Can't choose for something to surprise you
Set sail without a destination
See where a wind will take you
You never know where you're gonna fall.
But I'm not worried, no I'm not worried at all.

And I'm doing just fine
I'm always landing on my feet,
In the nic of time,
By the skin of my teeth
I ain't gonna stress
Cause the worst ain't happened yet somethings watching over me.

And I'm doing just fine
I'm always landing on my feet,
In the nic of time,
Something by the skin of my teeth
I ain't gonna stress
Cause the worst ain't happened yet
Somethings watching over me like Sweet Serendipity

Oh, oh, oh oh oh, ohhhhhhh!
Sweet Serendipity
Oh, oh, oh oh oh, ohhhhhhh!

Fate can only find you
All something to surprise you
Set sail without a destination

Sweet Serendipity

tears.

i think mayday parade is bringing me to tears. haha.

that katie dont cry song! ada org pnah nyanyiii ~ hearts !

asal suma lagu2 dia aku penah dgr org nyanyi. haha.

i.think.i.will.miss.you.

suddenly m thinking about next year. hmph.

hai. syo.

hmmmmmm. sth smells fishy ~ n i dont quite like the smell.

coming up next - pierce.the.veil !

tau xxx. tekejut gla tadi. ok aaaaa~

n then ngantuk.

n then lapar lagi.

ALL TO MYSELF !

study.

exam.

ttn.

nak appppeeeee~

skip empat period tadi. bgos. keep it up.

geleng2. ^_^ boleh lagiiii..

kamu still comey ^_^ it really doesnt matter.

i need to go for a run.

can i jog to the gym, get on the machine, run my ass off til i feel faint n smell like a pig, n jog back home.

like, right now ?

or just jump into the pool, n just goof around in the water.

pls. oh. pls.

punk.goes.pop.three.

=O i think it sucks. the second one is wayyyyyy better. aiyo. this is depressing. haha

bek layan mayday parade !

When im sad, i stop being sad and be AWESOME instead. ^_^

i think i know whyy

how was school ? fine
did u fight with anyone ? no
are u sick ? no
are u sick in the heart ? no
are u jealous ? not yet
are u jealous that everyone is getting enggaged n ur not ? not at all

>_< dads like m thinking all the posibilities of why u are like this.

the words are coming, i feel terrible. AGAIN !

so, yeah, the pros of blogging. save urself from venting ur anger out to others and from making em listening to them. and leave it till there. ZIP. YOUR. EFFIING. MOUTH. the whole world doesnt need to know actaully. ^_^ what do u get even by telling the whole world ? power ?

and dont forget to smile n say ur actually ok. actually u are. u just cant handle it well. =)

firstly, yeah, normally, from 130pm onwards, id be like im hungry. im sweating. i smell like a pig. im. super. duper. hungry. and. not. comfortable. at. all. so its a hugee sign to say let aiman go back home before she starts throwing tantrums. and scream profanities k.

sooooo, firstly, i do wish my dad would park a tiny winy bit nearer to the front so then i dont have to walk to the other end of the road. hahah. it doesnt matter pun. just, sth that effingly bugs me is that...

i masok2 ja keta, duduk xsmpai satu saat, he starts talking about it. that ittttt was on the freaking paper. i mean sth associated with it larrr. yeah it was like the whole section of it. n hes like yeah we shud go n check it out. get ideas. yeah of coz i didnt say a thing. n he went on n on n onnnnn ~ it was to an extend where i wish i cud cry, scream n yell there n then in the car. gah. n hes like y arent u saying a thing ? m like i just waalked 10miles n just got in the car. the thing is, sepenat mna or sebebai mana aku pun, if i like sth, id just jump sky high n say omg3 ! where. when. what. but i didnt say a thing. yes im not happy with it. even yest he was asking me about it, its either id pass it to my mum or just shrug.

f. not. good. i do believe its like another sensitive topic which i do not wna heear at allll. one. two, il have a lottttt of arguments with my parents about it. gahh.

so, i think its obvious enough. n my dad realizes that im not happy with it.

yeah i do feel bad. but i dont like it !

get out of my head.

btw, ur my special huge teddy bear. XD

omg ? yea omg ! haha. popcorn nak ckitttt !

mula2. ok. suma ada pros n cons. so m born not so sensitive. mmg u can say things to me, even things that u shudnt say to anyone. m like yea xpla. yang bodo skali aku p layan n i dont fight back. i mcm yeah xpa just bcuz kamu ni sekian2 kpd saya, saya dgn bodonya dgr ckp ko. n then lagi sya layan, lagi sya x fight blek, lagi kamu ckp mcm tu. i didnt fight for my rights n cakap **** ko spa nk ckp cmtu dkat aku ? tu psal lama2 aku jd cam shit gla.

mmg aku xla dendam sgt. benda lma lantak a. i dont aim for paying back. tapi i wont forget. benda yg aku mrh, benda yg aku sket ati, soryy ckt, aku x cepat lupa. ada stgh aku xkn lupa pun. ada satu smpai skg aku igt. just so u know, u dont have any fucking right to say u dont like my father. u dont like my family, u cant accept the way my family is, esp my father, u can go n fuck urself off. ko xdak hak nk ckp mcm tu dkat aku. even to anyone actually. ko tu bgos sgt ka ? xpna fkr org ckp dkat ko cmtu rsa pa ? sket ati gak la. seteruk2 mna pun ayah aku, dia ttp ayh aku, ko xsuka, ko xyah kwn ngn aku pun xpa. aku xdak nk heran ! xingin aku pun !

pastu. lantak la results aku nk cmna pun. ko spa nk panggel aku bodo ? kalo ko profesor xpa a. even yea pun la ang spa nk kata kat aku cmtu ? ni mcm ngn pa g. pdhl result aku lg bgos drpd ko. kalo results awesome xpa gak. ni bole pangge aku bodo n wt cm diri sniri pndai. oihh. tlg la ckt. otak ltak mna? xsedar diri. ptot ar actually results cmtu. actually la kann.

seriously laaaa ~ some people no some species shud be caught alive, sent to an island n shot dead on the head okay ~

Hihihihihihihihihihihi. =D

^_^ heee.

Alhamdulillah.

Oh yes i csnt stop smiling. Heeeee! Aku tau aku syok over sgt psepa ann. Bkan aku pun. Haha

Southbay , 286

=) arini aaa. Bahagia. Tah. I feel happy. N free of probs. Mmg act free of probs pun. Kja kna lwn mls n crave for food ja. Heheh.

Pagi2 kol 7 dah ada wake up call. N then g jogging. I really dont und how can one be so athletic. Haha. N run yes i mean jog idk on the machine fr like 15mins? I fast walk pun dah adh lenguh kaki. Trus pening3 n then duduk. N thenn went for dippinggg. Hee. ^_^ suka! Rsa cm nk swim ja. Tp igt t kna mrh so i didnt. Hehe. Lepak2 smbg psai future n itttt tu. N gelak2 n mepek2 n then blek.

Sdeyh gak la. The worst part is tht im not saying i love it. Adeh. So i must make it in such a way where i wud love it la. Tht i can do. =)

pehtuhh. The three of us n abg raf p mkn dkat kdai tpi laut tu. I ws so effingly hungry i trus ja mkn. Jgn tnya byk mna. Smpai mum mcm eat slowly aiman. Ckp ka mkn ? Hahaha. It ws so nice. N then pegi kdai sblh, facing the sea, mkn cendoll. Sukaaaa~ dok smpai mlm pun xpa. It was just vry peaceful n nice. =) i just wish it didnt end.

Yeah. He said. Dah bole nmpk da. I wont be around for long. Hmph!

So it doest matter la. Xmo emo2. Kna slallu hepy. Ada mslh pun kita kna sllu ceria n heppy rite. Akutau aku ckp sng, haha but lets try. Smile always. Be friendly. =)

N make the best out of anything. N yeah just have fun.

I know this thing will be ok. It will be ok.

U are my rockstar !

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

Well the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

Hey now you're an All Star, get your game on - go play
Hey now you're a Rock Star, get the show on - get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold

It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now but wait 'til you get older
But the meteor men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the satellite picture

The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The waters getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire how about yours
That's the way I like it and I never get bored

U are my rockstar !

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

Well the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

Hey now you're an All Star, get your game on - go play
Hey now you're a Rock Star, get the show on - get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold

It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now but wait 'til you get older
But the meteor men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the satellite picture

The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The waters getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire how about yours
That's the way I like it and I never get bored

^_^ i think you are the one who is making me stay.

Kenape perlu studyy. Adoii.

Mula2. Aku nk ckp. Pandai2 ko la jga dri seniri. Aku xkan ckp or halang da pa2. Good luck. ^_^

Dueee. I m so bored. I wana sleep just bcz i love to sleep but i shud be finishing of maths.

Tingin. Nak. Tgk. Late. Nite. Muvi. Huaaa. Xpa2. Next year2. =)

Nak. Amek. Gambarr. Rarrr.

Nak. Blueberry. Ciz. Cake.

Ades. Lapar.

Do u know that u are too tall n big for me? Hahah

No its im too small actually~

I feel like crying. Coz esok kena bgn awal n kena jog. N activity slpas itu yg im not quite happy. I have a feeling esok aku mmmmmm n wat prngai dlu. Hahah. Ok so my hugest prob izzz m extremely lazy. Tidoq xyah hbq. I spend more than half of my day SLEEPING~ gahhh! N eating like a pig. So my diet is on hold jap. Xpa2. T tym cuti kkk. Haha. Exercise tu aaaaa~

But n so i did study. Admts. N phy later most prolly. Forcing urself isnt thattr bad. Haha. Like tmrw also. Gah!

Soooo. S=r(teta) haha. N err area is half r square teta. Kott. N then err differentiation. N triangle3 yg xbp suka.

So dads lkke i hope ur really studying n not dreaming bout ur bf. Ive passed thru tht phase alreadyy. The prob is just i am super duper lazyyy! I just wna eat. N. Sleep. Ades!

Final year exam weyhh!

N refraining myself from touching d laptop. Huhu

Check yes romeo !

OMG! I REALLY, FUCKINGLY DONT GIVE A FUCK !

i know there is something out there. i think i here it move. i have never felt like this before.

so mlm ni aa. mlm ja la an. dak2 balek2 sembang2, men ngn stocking tdoq dgn dia skaliii. hehehe. she is just oh sho cuteee ! dok berpelukan. haha. n then oh yea dads like did she sleep on the bed with u ? m like nooo she slept on the floor besideee the bed. gahh. dads like no ok fur n whatnot. i know2. hmph.

n thenn. arrr.of coz i tidoq smpai ke ptg as usual. i HAVE to STUDY !

so yea at last tunjuk gak my mid year results to my parents. so i tgk2 result tu balek, tu kira aku study mcm xpulun g i can dpt cmtu. n considered last minute studying. imagine if i betul2 pulun n devote myself sat jaa. i know i cannot get first. tp at least top three i can try. mslh nya. aku xlah serajen tuhh. gah ! the only problem is i dont seem to be studying. >_>

n tadi, for the first time in my sixteen years of life, my mum didnt buy me dinner. hahaha. coz she ckp who didnt ask u to place ur order earlier. m like =( i overslept.... yea i was like trun2 kol 630 tnya what m i eating ? suma dok dont know2. tgk btui2 dinner mmg dont know. ada la murtabak bhn grg n kuey teow tomyam bt its not mine. i kept asking wht m i eaing suma cam wat bodo i pun duduk ja la lantak ja sapa pnya makanan. i cudnt be bothred. sapa soh x beli. cam nk majok ja n ckp fine m not gona eat n lari nek atas. pastu kelaparan trok. hahahah

n thenn. ok my dad tnya straightforward kottt. i was like oh shit. i felt so bad. so tym dinner i ws like ok. i have sth to tell u guys. i have a confession to make. n then it went on. n then i was like ^_^ lega xterkata. depa pun mcm cool ok a. at least they know. i really want them to know. i dont feel good keeping anything away from them.

pehtuuuu. yea i tend to see if i need any pov or advice, il go to em. coz i tgk depa guna akai more than feelings. which i like the most. so after hearing it. i mcm. nods. btul2. consider2. thres nothing i can do anymore. lantak a. nak popcorn jaaa !

n its not easy to impress my dad. bek mcm mna pun ur not gona impress him. my mum bole. dad dia trus trg ckp it doesnt impress me at all actually. m like i seeee ~ sth new.


n they are totally weirdly weird tnite. idky.

okeyh3. cukup3. wat kejaaaa ~

sobs.

n sabtuuu. hmph ! ='(

fuck. wey. fuck.

my dad just asked me tis qs, in a very serious tone. n of coz muka aku pucat.

n i was like geleng2, not yet.

stupid la dey ! i shudve said yes. but m like no dont. not now. stupid !

xpa2. next time2.

oh fuck.

Chestnoooot.

Ptot ar result cm tu. XD!

" HEY BASTARD! I CANT KEEP MY FUCKING MOUTH SHUT ! "

^_^ muahahah~

a fall to remember ?

hahaha. yes it was ~ ! pertama kali in my life i actually yeah fell in public. in front of ppl. in front of abang2 ka pakcik2 repair keta.n makcik yg tgh tunggu keta dia kena repair. hahahah. so yeahla, besa la an. once i pokpek3 i bukan sedaq n xkan stop. so yea cita3 pufff i slipped n fell. jatuh terduduk. hahahah. saket kotttt ! dh la pas bgn kena tendang lak aku mcm adoihhh ! trus jatoh terduduk n then trus diam. mcm freezze sat smpai he kena cm da2 bgn2 bru i mcm ohh bgnn. i just sat there n was luffing my ass off.i was like arrr pungkoq sakettt ! haha. seriously. esok cm xle jalan paaaa ~

so mums like ur bf dok mana ? m like arrrr. then i trus ckp act i dont have one. n then she made tht ish face n elok2 la gtaw an. n then i gelak2 n said i adaa. haha. to be continued. XD

i dont mind sitting beside u the whole day. i would n i would love too. just sit there n hang with u n look at u n just chit chat with u. i wud just say sukaaa ~

actually, tu ja nk ckp. falling down isnt that bad. its funny. n painfull. hahah.

ok da. diet ok aaa. but i did mkn nugget n chose between icecream n nasik. so icecream aaa. n then nmpk zikrii. n then an aaaa. seriously, proves a point. im very lucky. =)

n thennnnn. yea. jom la wat homework n study !

i hope i can jalan esok.

oh n btw sabtu niii.mmmmmmmmm. =( x sukerrrr. hmph. yea hes like i thot u love it so much. m like mmmmmm.

na na na na ~

All to myself

I don't patronize
I realize I'm losing and this is my real life
I'm half asleep
And I am wide awake this habit is always so hard to break
I don't want to be the bad guy
I've been blaming myself and I think you know why
I'm killing time (I'm killing time), and time's killing you every way that I do

Did you say
Please just follow me
I thought you wanted me
Cause I want you all to myself
I can try and suck it up
I just can't suck it up
Make me feel like someone else
Please just follow me
I thought you wanted me
Cause I want you all to myself
I can try and suck it up
I just can't suck it up
Make me feel like someone else

I'm under the gun
Feel like the only one just can't decide what I'm running from
This isn't what I wanted but
I can't keep my filthy fucking mouth shut
It's not enough (It's not enough) it's never enough
And I wish I could breath without it getting stuck
Can't focus it (Can't focus it) but I try it over and over again

Did you say
Please just follow me
I thought you wanted me
Cause I want you all to myself
I can try and suck it up
I just can't suck it up
Make me feel like someone else
Please just follow me
I thought you wanted me
Cause I want you all to myself
I can try and suck it up
I just can't suck it up
Make me feel like someone else

Na-na na-na na
Na-na na-na na-na
Na-na na-na na
Na-na na-na na-na

(Please just follow me
I thought you wanted me
Cause I want you all to myself
I can try and suck it up
I just can't suck it up
Make me feel like...)

Did you say
Please just follow me
I thought you wanted me
Cause I can't stay with someone else
I'll try and suck it up
I just can't fuck it up
I want you all to myself

Did you say
Please just follow me
I thought you wanted me
Cause I want you all to myself
I can try and suck it up
I just can't suck it up
Make me feel like someone else

Na-na na-na na!

soooo... can i bring my date along ? XD

but i cant spell it out for you
no, its never gonna be that simple.

im sleeeppyyyy. tgk la nk wt keja pa ka pa kaaa. adehh ~

menantu. mak mentua. adeh ! hahaha

il be occupied app this weekend. gah. time2 nak dekat exam larrrr bole kluar. brrr ! tolong la ikut skaliiii ~ hahah

study wey. study.

ha ha ha

being nice to someone you dislike doesnt mean you're fake. it means that you are mature enough to tolerate your dislike towards them.

adeh. i cant help but to mention sth while walking back. gila aaaa~
must be coz m perty sleepy n tired n mlm ni ada chem. hmph ! n bla3~

oh n yea study of coz. =.= shit i have to do sth.

perhaps dieting is really not a good idea rite now, for now, esp during this period of time.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm~

>_< i hate this feeling.

Im allergic to the word moving and further studies. Gah!

Lets start studying even just a bit

I had butterflies in my stomach.

U make me fall for u over and over again. And over again. Without failing. Without trying. Without knowing. Gah!

Btw. Happy Belated 10.10.10. Wanted to make it 10.10pm tp xkesampaian. Next year pulak.

Oh n today. Hahahah. ICE CREAM TRUCK RULEZZZ! DING~ DONG~. !!! The nicest thing i pernah dgr. Hahaha!!

Dadys back. =) n yes i laugh a lot. I giggle a lot. I cant help itttt~

=) so far so good. N now i dont wana fight. For a fact i know i would cry. Even now, haha.

OH

MAI

GATT

I

CANT

BELIEVE

WHAT

I

JUST

READ

ON

MY

PHONE

HA

HA

~

=) adeeehh. Ijdk what to say. Haha. In both stuff. Yeahhh~

=) m happy. I really am.

i am believing. =)

When I was younger
I saw my daddy cry
And curse at the wind
He broke his own heart
And I watched
As he tried to reassemble it

And my momma swore that
She would never let herself forget
And that was the day that I promised
I'd never sing of love
If it does not exist

But darling,
You, are, the only exception
You, are, the only exception
You, are, the only exception
You, are, the only exception

Maybe I know, somewhere
Deep in my soul
That love never lasts
And we've got to find other ways
To make it alone
Keep a straight face

And I've always lived like this
Keeping a comfortable, distance
And up until now
I had sworn to myself that I'm
Content with loneliness

Because none of it was ever worth the risk

Well, You, are, the only exception
You, are, the only exception
You, are, the only exception
You, are, the only exception

I've got a tight grip on reality
But I can't
Let go of what's in front of me here
I know you're leaving
In the morning, when you wake up
Leave me with some kind of proof it's not a dream

You, are, the only exception

And I'm on my way to believing
Oh, And I'm on my way to believing

mader

fader

fucker

~

Feel the earth

Arrr. I feel lke smiling. I feel like crying. Haha. Adess. Hahah.

Not to mention png pla coz admts. Haha.

Suka kamu ! (=

aku lebeih cenderung ke arah menjadi seorng perempuan ? hahaha

i just watched confessions of a shopaholic n another cindrella story. i know so outdated shut up.

OMG!!! selena is so cuteeee !!! this selena-is-oh-so-cute syndrome will take awhile to fade away. hahaha. sukaaa !!!

i know. abeskan homework aiman. study aiman. hehehe. jgn buang msa aiman.

n i just had magnum. heee. omg hahah.

n u knoww, ades. i really hope i wont blow it off. its just not it, its THIS IS ITT ! u know...

im hungryyy ~~~

n tah ar. xtau cna nk explain. leme just enjoy my weekends. =)

this is not small, this is gigantic !

adoihhh ~ this isnt wowww.

I have never thought of that. I have but not to that extend. Hmph.

mula2 aku cm ah xpala, n then btui2 tgk oh shit !

SAY HELLOO ! =)

It's the feeling I get
My palms with sweat
Like some kind of daydream
I'll never forget
I'm stuck in this spin
Why does it begin

again aku cakap, serious, bodoh betul.

obviously la kan, cuaca panas. sedar x ? xsedar tlg sedarkan diri anda.

fuck man fuck ! serabut !

n bodo gilaaa ! xtau shut up je lar.

u think u know all ?

punya la bodo.

bodo la cakap.

asal time2 ni kena dpt berita cmni. haha. y i feel bad pun xtau. sdeyh ar. even the plus points its like gazzillioonnsss of em.

eventho its like a dream kan, mmg aku dok sebut, ha tu la psai, ang sebut, kan dh dpt. gah ! so the thing is, jgn dok sebut, one day some day some how mmg akan dpt n mmg akn jdi.

i just entah. never ever in my life thot itl happen. so now, really, dreams can come true. hahah. the never- ever- thought- kinda dreams. im facing two of em rite now.

adehhh. i have to watch tv or sth.

i may not sleep pun tonite. coz gah !

i just cannot accept it yet.

end of next year

serious, mula2 rasa happy xterkata, like seriouslyyy. n then lama2,now, i just dont know what to say. serious semak. idk what to feel. i feel like crying. serabut gilaa. adehhh~

yeah ill miss u a lot too. hmph ~ mmmmmmm ! =(

nak nangehhh..... serious nnti aku ngeh btui gak.

only u can stop it

so mula2, exammmm. kena start study daahhh.

two, yea hidup tnpa mslah mmg memboringkan. either its bcuz u urself is causing it or it might be others. hidup bukan hidup tnpa mslah. true ? kinda. hidup tnpa org berckp xseronok. btul ? hahah.

so i heard it, firstly, never ever crossed my mind, i was so shocckedd. n aku panaihhh st aaa. mcm dok jerit2 n then m like hmm lantak la. it has to stop. this cannot go on.

soooo. question is. sampai bila aiman? sampai bila ? i do know what to do, n what not to do. how to do it. n perrrtttyy much know what to say. n i know im not alone. its like a good news, to some. i just need to stick to it n be READY! n its not soo complicated i guess. its just, im not doing it. for some reason idky. maybe im too lazy or yeah m scared or thinking too much. this is when we say JUST DO IT ! i know it doesnt hurt, n il be happier actuallyyy. or i just dont wana take the risk n face the stares n stuffs n stuffs. its not so simple la actually. i have to be mentally n emotionally prepared n strong. hahaha. physically too perhaps just in case i wana beat myself up or others wana beat me up. heehhe.

my mum just said m plain lazy, oh god, so true. keja tiap2 mlm chat, maen, tidoq, dgq lagu. wasting time. thats all. gah !

Don’t ever let somebody tell you you can’t do something. Not even me. All right? You got a dream, you gotta protect it. People can’t do somethin’ themselves, they wanna tell you you can’t do it. If you want somethin’, go get it.

n for a mo there aku rsa cm,aaa, tlg a, aku rsa idup aku ada mslh gak, da byk benda g nk fkr, byk benda yg aku kena face sniri, maybe xtau ja, so kena tmbh g ka ? rasa cm xperlu ja. kalo nk tmbh, p la tmbh hidup org len yg mmg suka mslh n complications n whatsoeverrr~

i think this time is hard, i mean for me coz tgkla keadaan sekeliling. tho its like (= !

i nk kta, tp mcm naaa not now. tp bila an? i am quite sure il say yes. but whenn ?

I HAVE TO GET OVER IT SOON SO I DONT HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT ANYMORE.

the list has to be written down. i have to get up, n do it. n yea study.

oh n btw tht two hours was nice. ive never felt like that for like ages. hehe. sukaaa~ tenang, free, problemless, comfy, secure, safe, its just me. =)

Not so great minds dont think alike.

Mcm dgn ttoooottt btul. But xpa, lantak la, one day, some day, some how kannn. =)

N i admit. Yeah! Aku sukaa!! Hehehe. Cm bhgia aaa. Aku cm nk peluk2 jaaa.

Onne dayyyyyy..... I wonder whennn. Il have to just wait n see n laugh out loud. Haha.

No im not ready yet. But yea i have the urge to make a new list n stick with it, atleast make it last longer tis time. But i knw eventually il say yes. =)

whatever you want to do, do it now. for life is time and time is all there is.

blackk sheeep -

m boredd ~ hhaha. i have work to do but m soooo lazyyyy.

aku gelak ja wey. aku cm gelak aaaa ~ pehtuh an. ah yea. dudeeee ~ it sounds like mee. i alwiz say tht. but anyways, why should i bother. why bother right ?

i wna ask him lotsa qs, tp dah jd cmni, m like naaa. next timeee. i wonder hows tmrw gona be like. i may just stay ultimately shut man !

weyyy3! since im like boredd, hahahah. yea nk stay up a. wat merapu cm smlm. n then muka pucat an. aaaarrrr ~

btw, yeah. dont be rushy. think carefully. even if its a no, so what ? i dont need it.

shit. dia tnya aku password. aku cm. serious toot ! ok so we share passes. haha

seriously, m luffin over ntg again. omg ! hahahah

n seriouslyyy. kamu comey ~

s-s-s-s-s-

muleee2, hee. folio accounts dah antar. hopefully itl be oke.

now kena set for sej presentation n exam end of the year pulakkk ~

ok. so mula2. shit. im obviously so not ok today. m not normal today. smpai ckgu norida mcm aiman, jwb soalan ni, ckgu tgk aiman diam jaaa. yea coz normally i dont even look at the board, but ill be talking away, but i didnt. i did look at the board but setakat tgk ja la. m like blur tau ak. blur teruk. restless. xtentu arah. xtau nak wt pa. gahh ! esok lagi laaa~~

i wasnt shocked, wel i was. entah la cna nk describe how i felt. but for a fact i know i was totally not ok n muka smpai pucat. hahah. it was kinda like someone entah ! gahhh~

bodo arrr. seb bek exam xla esok ka apa. if yea mmg ckp bodo gla. seriously, this has to stop. i have to control myself.

n teruknya its effingly obviouss~

so aim - make.it.stop.a.s.a.p.

adeh. semak !

dahla xle msg.

tu ja. ok. off to sleep. hehe. n rindu rubics cubeee ~

shit. aku rsa muka aku pucat skg !

fuck. im speechless. oh wait. no im not. coz i can still say fuck

FUCK!!!

prinsip perakaunan tingkatan 4

aku cubit kanggg~ tu pun ckup bgoih aku xcubit coz ang comey ngat. hahah

tu a. mulut aku masin ngat. tgk la pa jdi. wish granted. aku mati akai gak esok ~

yeah. arini, aku ckp sth yg aku xpna ckp dkt spa2. my very own personal point of view towards someone. yg slma ni aku simpan. n dia cm tekejut gak a.

adeh !

oh yeah. alhamdulillah. accounts dah imbang. muka merah smpai ckgu tnya awat muka kamu merah. hahahah/ serious wey. perasaan yg xpena rsaaaa ~

mmg aku bukak bisness, tiga ari tutup da.

k ar.mls nk blog. ~~~~~ (+

hve a nice day !

You are the only exception.

So bfre i end my day. Mula2 pg2 buta i had yeah oats lke nrml. N then t skola smpai2 i trus bkak d tupperware bskut. Nrmly il bkak n let ppl eat. Diz tym i dok melantak sorg2. Pstu xpa my mum wt nsik grg n i likeee n i mkn3. Btw it is sdap. N then i had er nuggets. N then icecream. Two applesourz btw! N then kek pisang. Nthen kerepek. N then tu ja kotttt. My duet nak abeh dah kot. Tu seb bek ada org bek blnja icecream. XD. SUkka. (=

n then. U knw i ws dieing to wait for dinner. My perut dok ngeh. Haha. So i had like aym n d blck sos tingy.Ikn grg. Asm pdas. Ulam. Smbl blcan. Syur. Sup dua mgkuk. Nsi tmbh dua kali. N i ws lke i feel lkw eatg somemoreee~ n dady was like enuf aiman enuf. Hik3!

N i ws like ur hawt. Ur so hot. Ur hotterrrr. Haha. Smpai member ckp rimas aaa. Haha.

Today mmg gone.

So esok la. Il try controlling la kann. Iffff i do, i get free icecreamm~

Yeah im in the process of knowing u. STILL~ N udont seem to care anymore. Which yes, that is what i need. I just dont hv to b scared. Doesnt matter. Follow the flow. Have fun. =)

N i dont need the title. It really doesnt matter =) what matters the most is just "it" =)

Soooooo ~~. (=

HEY BASTARD! (s) random thots, random people. Soooo~

Last qs for today, btw, bpa gf ang ada wey? At least aku ngn sorg ni ja, tu pun xdk pa. Pa cer? Aku gak la xmalu a ?

Sooooo~

Hey bastard!

Yes. Im the one who is shameless. Im the one who is walking down the street nakedly n flashing my *^€_€|£ to all guys. N the best part is i dont admit myself as a complete, total bitch. Hows that?!

Hey bastard!

I love laptops. I love phones. I love internet. Oh yea its the whole wide world? Oh no its world wide web. Oh i forgot, its almost the same actually!!

Hey bastard!

Have fun. Go ahead. I will have my own fun when im ready n when the time comes. N when it happens, fuck u man !

=) i cant wait for that time anyways.

Hey bastard!

Im smarter than u btw. Everyone knows that.

Hey bastard!

I have a life, but u dont.

Hey bastard!

U suck. Ur sick. Ur not cute. U dress like sos.

Hey bastard!

Seriously. Fuck. Yourself. Man.

-sory for the bad words-

N yea. I love ur handd. (=

n btw, u wont understand.

And u wont get it, wont u?

n2. not forgetting, nickelback, puddle of mudd, incubus, good charlotte, three days grace. n erm. i think that shud be good.

melts ~

i could be staring at ed sloan for agessss i tell u.

n i really effingly wont mind watching em life coz they dont suck at all !

sukaaa a~~~~~~~

<3 ! gah.

ed sloan ~

om g! hehehehehheheh. hahahahahha.

oke2. the thing is. im going crazy. dari bila tah. i can jsut laugh

over.

nothing !!

WHY BOTHER ??!!??

mula2, i do miss pg. as usual, lalu umah tu sdeyhh. haha. balek pun xmo balek. tp theres a reason y i still blek. muahahha.

i was like nah. take my heart n have it. rip it open n look whts inside.

dear joeee,, i need ur help. id do anytg. heheh.

i realllyyyy need u if it does happen. i dont wna embarass myself.

n yeah. i have well lotsa qs to ask tis person. well not byk but knda byk kot. tah a. n also, i know, someday, somehow, il confess. i akn kata actually i..... but when..... of coz la kan. but then tu tgk la keadaan cmna. haha.

arini a, my mum din buy anytg except for hse stuff. ntg for her. i ksian gak. coz mmg no reason for her to buy. for me aaa. hehhe. so i still nak beli one more type of shoe ni or one more flip flops yg comey n suda. dah dpt dua tu, len suma i guna duet sniri. n for converse is duet sniri or bday pressy. heeee. m changing. to a girl ~ the aunty mcm ah bgus la n whtnot. m like argh. so i la yg dok beli arirni. gahh ~ ok im gona die. its ugh !

omg. yes aku syok. melepaskn prsaan is d best. hahaha. xla lepas suma tp ckp dgn sepenuh ati mmg bes.

ok. i want food.

n i like you.

n i think my mum heard everything.

hahahahah.

XD !

anyways

YOU ARE FUNNNAYYYYY !!!!

=.='