i feel stupid and contagious

from the heart.. - give it thought.. mum said tht to me.. n its. tah.. tdi i asid bye2 nk p mandi.. then sdny she jz said.. from the heart.. n m like hurh? frm the heart? shes like yeah.. frm the heart.. so m like u mean cook from the heart? shes like yeah.. bfre tht we were tlkin bout sth.. then cme to from the heart.. wel its i cry from the heart.. i hate crying.. seriously.. made worse if im sick, n cry, i tell u.. grrr ! well i cry knda a lot tho.. hahaha.. stupid ting.. so yeah..


FROM THE HEART ....


i tried to help u, or idk.. from the heart.. i din mean anything.. but sometimes.. i jz feel like giving up helping ppl.. y ? coz its ok.. idm if u dont appreciate it.. idm if u dont even notice it or acknowldge it.. just it turns out. my - help - is not helping at all.. but it gets worse.. so ... wtever.. maybe i shuldnt help anyways

yeah.. im being the hopeless oh so pathetic aiman again.. not forgettin suicidall.. urhh... leave tht.. so xpla.. schools jz near. i dont wna expct anything frm it..

n i nearly frgt tdays the last day of 2009 n esok dah 2010.. geezzz.. so yeah.. il b on.. :) lama gila x on.. rinduu.. n errr.. yeah itu sja..

:)

oh n yeah.. wna play gtr..

dah....

n again i say.. i love tlking to my dad more thn my mum.. prefer it more tht way too. he pays more att wen i talk.. lisens to evrtn i ssay.. n yeah responds to it too.. mum.. geez... i knw u xbekenan ngn dat person.. but pls at least give some interest.. haih.. so wtever i just tell daddy..

n....

whiteyyyyyyyyyyyyyy..... whyyyyyyyyyy.. my leggggggggggggggg....

m enjoyin time with the kitties

:)

bila la nk exercise..

jumper

I wish you would step back
From that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies
That you've been living in
And if you do not want to see me again
I would understand, I would understand

The angry boy a bit too insane
Icing over a secret pain
You know you don't belong
You're the first to fight
You're way too loud
You're the flash of light on a burial shroud
I know something's wrong
Well everyone I know has got a reason
To say put the past away

I wish you would step back
From that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies
That you've been living in
And if you do not want to see me again
I would understand, I would understand

Well he's on the table and he's gone to code
And I do not think anyone knows
What they're doing here
And your friends have left you
You've been dismissed
I never thought it would come to this
And I, I want you to know
Everyone's got to face down the demons
Maybe today

You could put the past away
I wish you would step back from
That ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies
That you've been living in
And if you do not want to see me again
I would understand, I would understand
I would understand, I would understand
I would understand, I would understand
Can you put the past away

im a disease

i just died over some reasons

n i say, over the reasons, i should really die..

hey2, mari kita berblog :)

im calm rite now for a mo, - maybe the end of tis blog i wont be anymore. .ahahha -

sooooo.. i jz got up from a approximately four hrs sleep kot.. m sneezinnnnnnnnn.. then drip2.. n ehem5.. sore throat.. a slite one.. but if i dont see the doctor, il get fever n gets worse.. so now m cool.. :) slept in parents room tho.. xpena.. n i hugged my guitar to sleep.. hahaha...

n yeah.. kena marah ngn ahma coz eatin rice at an inappropriate time.. so m like nvm la, later start school i wont b doing this again.. then she goes bla3.. as for me. wtf. lntak p la kat aku aku nk wt pa.. wt masa ni, tinggl bp ari ja g nk start skola, aku nk tmbh 5 kali pun aku xlalu n xdk masa coz keja akn byk. aku xtau pun aku balek umah mkn lunch ka dak.. coooolll ?!!!! so leave me alone n let me be ! same goes to the laptop.. daddy sniri bg.. he kata xpa.. nti start schoool xle dah.. so let me do wteva i wantttttttttttt !

geez.. yes i cant accept the fact smnjak aku trima result, then cuti yg lebih ni, its like.. haih.. time2 ni la.. - do i have to repeat, i tink i wud - nak men gtr n organ puas2.. nk muvi marathon.. nk tido ka xnk tdo ka.. nk mkn byk mana pun ka.. nak dok kt luaq kpnsan men kcg ka.. nk cycle ka.. apa kaaaaaaaaa !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! geeezzzzzz ! yeah ppl ckp xpa, it doesnt hapen alwiz n theres alwiz another time.. bt yeah la cuti 09 xkn mai dah, n big 2010 akn mai.. geeezzz.. wtever.. so yea.. m tryin to enjoy..

i want my bed..........

n yea.. now its knda like i have to hug sth to sleep.. kah3

next year kan.. oh shittt.. yeah the to do list.. emm.. thing su have to do bfre u die n mission.. errrr....

and then.. next year kan.. dah ah.. mls nk fkr.. hahaha..

everythings blurr for a mo

hamster.. nods.. wont be in the same school..

malina.. wey.. cook for me... ahahah

yg len2.. ish...

am i seriously stupid again or what ???

iris

rivermaya

Nobody knows
Just why we're here
Could it be fate
Or random circumstance
At the right place
At the right time
Two roads intertwine

And if the universe conspired
To meld our lives
To make us
Fuel and fire
Then know
Where ever you will be
So too shall I be


Close your eyes
Dry your tears
'Coz when nothing seems clear
You'll be safe here

From the sheer weight
Of your doubts and fears
Weary heart
You'll be safe here

Remember how we laughed
Until we cried
At the most stupid things
Like we were so high
But love was all that we were on
We belong

And though the world would
Never understand
This unlikely union
And why it still stands
Someday we will be set free.
Pray and believe


When the light disappears
And when this world's insincere
You'll be safe here
When nobody hears you scream
I'll scream with you
You'll be safe here

Save your eyes
From your tears
When everything's unclear
You'll be safe here

From the sheer weight
Of your doubts and fears
Wounded heart

When the light disappears
And when this world's insincere
You'll be safe here

When nobody hears you scream
I'll scream with you
You'll be safe here

In my arms
Through the long cold night
Sleep tight
You'll be safe here

When no one understands
I'll believe
You'll be safe

Put your heart in my hands
You'll be safe here

ITS

Mixed up

and

Messed up

- hey, Isnt it ME ? -

look at me

What Do You See ?

THE PADANGS - WHATS WRONG WITH YOU

- mama farah kata dia nampak aiman mcm budak yang ceria...

huhu... i wish i really am..

sooo... nnti ah...

i wna write bout wat i saw aft i dpt my results yest.. hepy ones.. :)

fuck betul

eeee.. xsukaa..

aiman ! stop depending on people !!!!

what's wrong with you !

- the padangs

a love to share

PMR 8 A's !!!!! weeee

alhamdulillah, thank u god.. :)

sooo.. i was the second on line to know my resuults.. fuh i was so hepy n smiling so wideeeeeeeeee.. n the burden in my heart is gone.. n easy to say that im very in a hepy mud today.. hope it goes on.. n it means m extra talkative, m extra loud, m extra friendsly.. m okeh today.. :) even dat ting, its just not disturbing me.. weee e:D

soooo.. err yeah.. mula2 slm zurina.. she was tah xtra hepy today... and then called rizal.. igt dia dlm keta.. rupa2nya dia dlm dewan... so cari2 dia, nmpk dia, lari dkt dia n peluk dia !!!!! haahhaha n cudnt stop talking n smiling n panting n all.. ahahahha.. hes like slowly2.. n pats on my head.. :) heeee... and then pokpek2 g.. called mum shes veryyy heppyyy :) heee.. yeah i love mking ppl hepy.. wish i can do tht alwiz tho.. huhu... so xplah.. ahma say raining is falling.. or sth like tht.. it means its gud.. n she said to dad. regardless of how well i did.. il get kaching ! $ !

so i have sth to ask dad, raudha n perhaps sis in law. or apa2 pun xpla.. dh dpt 8a ckp da :)

and then pix time ! amek er 4 ja pown.. hahahha.. two me holding the slip.. mum dok kalot sgt soh amek gmbq.. b tlg ambilkan.. :D tq b ! and then one with daddy n one more with b.. daddy tlg ambelkan.. wuhu ! hahaha.. dads really into b.. i mean not really.. but he is into him.. he likes u.. ahahah.. yeahh :D

haih... :)

m actually at the hosp.. thank god ada wifi.. tu pun the username n psasword yg minah at the counter bg slh.. i figured out myslef.. hahha.. tonite dinner sorang2.. huhu.. sedeh la sgt kan.. hahaha.. weeee ! n yeah most prolly esok blek.. mums suprisingly recovering fast rather than the last operations she had. alhamdulillah.. soooo sabtu i kena msak.. mg ! xplah..

ii cnt wait for school to open tho.. tho with the phobia. but tah.. imiss al of em. but. haih..

i cnt accept the changes thts gona happen.. so bfre dad left.. oh yea did i tell u i almost killed ma.. ahahhaha.. okeh.. cnni.. m very hepy tday la kan.. so msok2 shes like come gime a kiss.. i pun ha la dah syok lupa suma dgn two overloaded bags, tros p kat dia pelok.. thank god ntg hapen to her.. but almost lah.. hahah.. i knw its not funny.. i have to be extra carefull.. hurh..

mr lim !!!! jz called me!!!!!! omg! i miss him so much ! hahahaha

okeh2.. ehem2.. the chnges like no 3a3 anymore.. even some ppl arent gona be there anymore.. thts saddening.. haihh.. n aku wat manja.. ahhaha.. so rizal was sitting on the chair.. so i just hugged him round the neck while complainin bout how they wont be this n that n all for next year.. hmphh... danggg

xpa2..

:)

still

nvm

:)

well next stop izzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

SPM 2011 !!!!

see ya there :D !

ok. i have this rash on my left arm n its gatal.. hahahha..

emmm....... geezzzz..... i m bothered wth two things. satu results.. yeah m feeling it. but no soooooooo yet.. stni otw ka yeah la.. il start asking for oxygen.. heheheh

ermmmmmm.. i tink i need to bathe n telan byk2 chocos.. hehehe

n anyways.. hey.. i did it too didnt i... sooo... wats the biggggg....

toodles

- i dont like tis ! -

not better

well i dont have to worry about u anymore if i go away.. :)

i mean it..

n sooo.. tmrws the day..

lets see how it goes..

n yeahh.. shud i ?

can i jz tear it away n burn it ?

and i und one more thing.. how this two relationships.. i mean types.. survives.. its sick act..

and2 i wish i didnt ask u that.. m i stupid or wat again ?

- dont ask me anything..

i thought its always anyways....

i wish i am not ******* to anyone :D

associates

the longer it is. the more i hate it.

oh n yeah.. next time, move to the south or north pole. i dont mind. its better. aite ?

emm.. n yeah things always dont fall into place. wherever or whenver u want or need it.

and injustice is part of life.

nothings perfect.

and seems like yeah. it wasn't enough.. or no.. its not enough.

n em. i have phobia of going to school.

il try to overcome it.

about results. freaks me out at times. but i dont know. i dont quite seem to care. not to say im upset of what had happened. today. its nothing at all actually. its normalllllll. i mean god says it has to be this way at this time, then be it. live with it. its not called upset. i dont know what its called or what it is. all i know is i just dont like things around me. almost everything around me right now i dislike.

n dad said oh yeah. u can get an ipod touch. - alert2 ! warning ! - im going to be his fullllllllllllllllltimeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee 24/7 secretary starting from the second i have the ipodtouch in my hands. - that is why hes actually so kinda keen of getting me one - il have to name it. actually oh is it? the organ is gideon.. ahahha.. the guitar lupa dah.. so i should find a name for the ipod, lappy and guitar. n yeah thts about all.

thats all. i wish to sleep.

and heyyyy.. i washed the clothes... n hung em.. weeeee.. i did something..

n yeah. i have a bad habbit of eating chocos n sweet tings.. wat do u expect ! i have a reason oke ?

oh wells.....

it wasnt on a mountain... tell me..

lets put it to test

lets try next year

you had a choice, u didnt blow it away actually.. hopefully not..

just u chose the other one, perhaps we say the less appropriate one

or perhaps of coz it is.. its just in ur mind.. ur thinking too much.. ur too scared to take risks.. to scared to try out chances.. opportunities.. u just let it go.. and then start mourning like a bloody fool.. who knows it wouldnt hurt at all? who knows its actually sth u really want? who knows u can do it? nobody knows.. unless u try.. u urself know it.. know what u really want.. too being cooped up.. in that small lil box.. dont wna get out of the comfy n safe zone..

and this is what u get

no point complaining though

its not gona help

not gona change anything at all

maybe u said u have tried.. but i say.. bullshit.. try harder.. i dont think u did anything at all..

u still have the other one.. though

go out there !

n fuckingly get it !

you want it !

you try !

to work for it ? perhaps.. i guess..




its your life afterall..


you're happy bcuz




YOU ARE HAPPY




<>

i dont know and i dont wish to know how or when or whatsoever

ram... ram.. ramm...

meow. meow. meow.

okehhhhhhhhh.. lets talk bout tday.. p alor star.. ntg bad hapened.. except otw bec.. aku bengang btowl.. hahaha.. oke the ting is.. the damn persona sdny dkt lcd screen tuh ada red lite blinking non stop.. then tau lah mum an.. paranoid thp cipan.. psatuh call la mamat gerald ni dok wt suara tension lah muka cm ngn pa ah.. aku lg la bengang.. i mean blink2 ja.. bknya tht car nak xplde pun.. tgk thermometer ok g.. suma ok.. boleh bergerak g.. dhlah time tuh at highway tp at gurun dah.. dkat ah..geeezz.. xtau bp kali lah aku jerit kat dia an coz over ah.. ahahah.. lek ah beb.. bnda tu blinkin ja.. bknya nk xplode.. haihh.. mintak maaf la na.. aku terpaksa.. aku xtau la cna dia survive.. gosh... so i p la bukak manual bca.. tah2 dia kata pasai alarm keta bla3.. so dh smpai tol utara tuh, stop la.. i told her to get out of the car.. check all the doors.. lock n unlock it then start the engine.. tah2 bnda tu ilang.. then i said to her.. ha jerit lagi.. pergh ! pa la... ni nk parking pun jenuh aku yg kena instruct.. i knw for a fact la kan i can drive beta than her..

so xpla.. tu ja.. dhla aku dok tgh mkn lam keta.. dia wat drama.. n dah lah time tu aku bru bgn tidoq.. mmg sial btul.. spa x bengang.. thn at pacific err.. yeah.. nowadays i see, yeah la wat do u xpect dulu almost evry wik shopping.. nih haram x.. dhla aku cuti skola.. bgoih btui la kan.. xpla.. evrytime she shops, she spends like nobodies bzness.. no kid.. smpai tgn aku lenguh nk angkat.. byk.. ahahha.. then dia shopping bju ah, the lady thre tnya dkt anak xmau beli ? ha kena ! then aft tht p la diz kedai dia tnya lah nk ka bju ni.. tht bju is like blouse ah.. n like checkered tingy3? watt? i xtau la. ahha.. i knw its nice.. but then like x cukup besar bg dia.. so xla beli.. xpla.. thennnnnnnn... - i knw m so such a kid - - btw mum yg kata nk ka ? m like ah okk ah.. u wnt to buy, u buy - tis kedai teddies.. mula2 frm outside nmpk diz small kitten.. well the similar one is just bside it n its hugeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... ahahha.. beli yg mini la.. but xbeli yg tuh.. i bot tis puppy.. weeeee :) its sme concept as fish n tigger wic is bean bag but its a puppy n like er milky peachy in colour.. kinda cute ah.. nak jugak beli yg bulu2 or short bulu punya but its bulu.. nt dt keen of it.. mula2 nk beli dis red or black devil or diz blck cat or stich.. ended up thttt... the gal at the shop tnya nk beli tuk spa ? m like meee.. ahahahhaha.. bengongs..

td pg.. ahahhahah.. my bro hoz was sleepin on the couch.. xpa ah.. me n kak noran dok sembang ah.. sdny my bro kentut... hahahhahha.. comey gila.. then norans like aiman ?! comey?! that is gross la !!!! ahahhaha

soooo.. now i have a monitor cable.. i can use tht idk how many inch flat screen to gnti tis lappy.. cool gak ah.. bsaq.. weeeee......

soooooooo... tx to my bro n kak noran.. i tink i knw wat i sud ask if i get 8as.. 7 xleh ah.. sooo.. hopefuly.. nk ipod touch... n emm straighten my hair.. my hair tuh i xckp g.. iphone tah ah.. my phone stil ok.. but nt dt dah.. since tday.. the ok button doesnt work.. ahahha.. high time to change ? entah... n both of em.. tuh.. i wont mix there and then la.. tunggu la next year harga turun ka.. n my hair dkt cny ka.. n time tuh kena wt time holiday.. sng nk jaga.. even i knw the results is like tis thurs.. i still have time to do my hair, but entah la..........

so i kena active blek.. nowdays m putting lotion on my legs and hands. ahahhahaha.. pecayalahh... nak make a habbit.. - it wont llast even for four days.. huahuahua.. - then emm.. start puting moisturizzer on my face n the pimple tingy n the vitamin e tingy.. then my hair is conditioning - wen was d last time laaaaa.. - then put the cream at nite n serum in the morning.. dangg.. oh the musk.. shittt... n yeah.. for my skin.. perhaps coz im in teens tu dia jd cm tu kot.. hormones.. if aft form five ka sth like dt i still have it, m gona do sth bout it.. well even now pun lah if its critical il ask mum..

m in love with mitch.. kah3... app hes a gay.. no wonder hes goddamn cute..

n yeah.. results khamis nih.. my prents nk mai.. o m g.. goshhhhhhhhhhhh... so yeah epa just said nk tunggu lama2 suma.. idt i can.. huhu.. cz sure mum kena p keja blek.. tis tht.. blah3..

aku btui2 sick dok umah lah.. hahahahhaha.. i knw i just went out td.. kalo bole aku xmau dok umah... just by tis 3 months.. i din go aniwer. i mean i did.. to jb.. tu pun coz of tht.. n thts all. omg la wey.. if mcm ni la.. m gona plan ahead.. means aft form four exams mmg kena set dh lah.. i cnt nganga like tis. n die la kan..

yeah.. btul..since ever pindah sini.. we have less support system.. i mean actually the support system is gone..

idt theres anything more left to say...

coz

idup

aku

mmg

memboringkan

.

u know, im always lost..

suddenly i feel..

i really have to find something that i like..

something that i really do like.. that i can stick to it for life..

put all my effort into it..

something that i really love..

something that i really cherish..

something.. er.. something.. something la..

eeee, pening pala otak aku ckp ngn ang..

bek aku ckp ngn dinding tau ak !!!

owl city (=

You would not believe your eyes
If ten million fireflies
Lit up the world as I fell asleep

'Cause they'd fill the open air
And leave teardrops everywhere
You'd think me rude
But I would just stand and stare

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems

'Cause I'd get a thousand hugs
From ten thousand lightning bugs
As they tried to teach me how to dance

A foxtrot above my head
A sock hop beneath my bed
A disco ball is just hanging by a thread

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems
When I fall asleep

Leave my door open just a crack
(Please take me away from here)
'Cause I feel like such an insomniac
(Please take me away from here)
Why do I tire of counting sheep
(Please take me away from here)
When I'm far too tired to fall asleep

To ten million fireflies
I'm weird 'cause I hate goodbyes
I got misty eyes as they said farewell

But I'll know where several are
If my dreams get real bizarre
'Cause I saved a few and I keep them in a jar

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems
When I fall asleep

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems
When I fall asleep

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
Because my dreams are bursting at the seams

eEe . . .

a medley of songs

daddy, i cant believe you said all those to me

=)

thank you

i love you

;)


<>

dude, seriously . . .

headache

vomit

am i stupid or wat ?

It wasn't enough - the chronicles of life and death

sejak dari kelmarin,

tido aku xlena.. - seriously.. aku dah xreti nk tido cnna... i was like how did i sleep yest? crap.. -

makan xkenyang.. - balek2 td dr tesco bru tuh, hey that place is cool.. at lesat much more stuff than the old one.. so i gorged myself down with magnum, tiger biscuits, small cupcakes, nuts... oh yeah ferrero... geezzzzzzz....... n mum n ahma dok usha pelik.. m like dont ask me y.. n keep on eatin.. dhla tension.. grrrr ! -

mandi x basah.. - nah.. basahh.. i still smell gud.. :) -

so one hurray for that.. okeh.. so lets blog.. hahahha...

eversince i heard bout - 24th - im like.. idk.. hahaha.. i cant even play organ coz like lost my concentration.. so now.. m mvg bec to games.. its easier.. but no2.. i still do play organ.. n errrr.... yeah.. wat m i gona ask from rizal if i get 8as.... hurmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...... rarrrrrr....


good charlotte rules !


> the yellowcard,simple plan arguement - b.... =) !! il alwiz rmb that..


> why are you talking malay to me ? - robin rizal

can u just imagine that? hahahah


> xiao yui - amalina.. im a nemo too.. XD

> u daftar msn xdak tempat dah - uncle malik.. wth r u tryna do mannnn... just for laughs.. :)


so yeah.. result dh nak kuar.. skola pun nk start.. i have to start getting up.. rearrange myself.. tido tu biar la cukup.. bgn tu biar la awal.. bilik tu biar lah bersih.. get ready blah3...

geez... jz imgine.. we wud be very bz again.. or maybe as bz as nver bfre rite..... ngn ttn... xpa2.. il enjoy it.. :) it makes me feel alive.. kah2

i have a list of to do things or must do things bfre i die.. mainly consists of well yeah my entah la.. il write it down in a piece of paper laterrrrr....

and... em... erm... ................. haih......

n i like christmas.. hahaha.. its like.. u see.. the chocos.. the baju.. all the stuff time christmas n oso cny lawaaaaaaaaaaaa2!!!!!!!!!! like te chocos dang im like yeah taken away by it.. kah3.. - m gona stuff myself with few more sweet stuff later... -

n yeah i did xmas shopping at farmville.. hahahha.. my fishies.. i cant blive i said xpla.. biaq la depa mati.. bad2.. my cafe its cool.. waiting to xpand it... and then emmm yeah money againnnn.. n decorate.. wuhu...

mum luffed wen i gv tigger.. ahahah.. i did too.. even the bday card.. i realize sth.. how childish i can be.. -with this body size.. aiman pls grow aiman ! pls ! -

eagle eye cherry - save tonight ! - fuck man.. ilurveeeeeeeeeeee tht songgggggggg ! dulu suka gila2.. then lupa abes.. n now.. bec... weheee....

homer ***** and epa towel.. - kah3

nk dl suma simpsons seasons.. suppose to but ltr la..

yeah.. i cant blive 3mnths is jz gone like tht.. n that another errr 10 more months of life.. hahahah.. i mean.. school life yaddy2.. imagine.. im gona be 16. sweet sixteen.. ireally hope it is..

cut bout life.. lets talk bout studies.. future.. yeah its true.. form four la wer the game begins.. - john kramer.. heheh.. - i really g2 pay more att.. do more work.. everything double.. gawddddd............. chilllssss... hmphh...

xtau la wey.. its so menyedihkan...

so yeah.. even if id like to spend my time or we say waste it on pc or muvis or organ.. i cant anymore.. tops pun almost an houur n thats it... jz vsit my ikan, farm n cafe n neopets to colllect stuffs.. n then done... xpa2.. nnti bsaq nk keja elok2 an? mcm tu lah.. bersusah2 dhlu, brsng2 kemudian..

n oh yeah.. strt activating my brain.. readdddddddddddddd ! so yeah.. read form three stuff bec.. - no kid.. hahahaah -

any ideas wat to ask for pmr? grrrr...

speak mandarin in 30 days is jz bside me.. ahahha

lets make tis.. emm.. wa shi ..... errr.... - sth la.. - kai xing?.. not oke.. hahaha



KENE ACTIVE BALEK

dah ah...

is anybody listening ?

can u hear me when i call ?

im shooting signals in the air

memeningkan kepala otak

sooo...

i learnt dont worry be happy.. n m ok with it.. weeeee

pink panther, rite hand only.. ok la

adams femly both hands, but needs more practise.. laterrr

hapy bday song ! aku tau lgu tu 15 minit pun bole men dah.. but with both hands i mcm tah.. but weeeeeee ! m ok with it alredy !

n now m with fur elise.. geezzz.... peninggg.. hahaha.. actually pun.. tht song is very easy.. by less thn saatu jam bole punya.. but m with it since like two hours? bole la.. x lah merangkak sgt dah.. fuh...

n next is emmm... dk yet.. tgk la wteva it is..

sooooo.. dr aku bgn smpai aku tido aku keja men organ ja.. men game pun x dah.. well yeah except visit my fishies n my cafe n thts all..

tpi saw tetap tgk.. heheh :D i love john kramer !

it is memenatkan.. ahahahah...

nnnnnnnnnnnn ive yet to do mums bday card.. theme - bdak kecik.. ehehhehehe (=

ok dah.. bck to plyin... gawdddd...

but i like it tho.. ketenangan jiwa.. tho aft tht il start luffin - all by myself - coz xleh men.. ahahahha

toodles...

sneezy eazy

yabby ! jaby, jaby, jab! jab! jab!

= vomit =

geez.. you know what i wish i can do to you ?

haahaha.. its better you dont know..

(=

i just got up at 730am just to feed my fishies.. geezzzz...

n freaked out like hell last nite since i frgt to feed em n thot they died..

saw rulesss ! 2nd saw goin today..

yet to crap about simpsons. idk how mny fcking times ive wtched it.. its knda like i can rmb the lines n now wats next.. n wts wat.. dangg...

the kitty is sooooooooooooo cute !!!! sukaaa... tq2.. :)

mums freakin me out.. shes so two sided.. shes being xtra good to me.. grrr

ohyeah.. organ mode on.. how i wish i started earlier.. so goin with er pink panther lter left hand n adams family both hands.. next is errr tah...

nyeah.. btw.. results r cmg.. n schools round the corner... i m hepy but stil sad.. i sud b hepy.. thts wen i get my life bec.. being active.. :) on the other hand.. no i dont.. :(

and i stil dont get it..

tennis is funnnnn... nk maen lagiiiii... tx b ! tx amin ! n im sooooooo soryyy...

dads well dad is being dad.. he wants to join in tennis.. hahaha.. n yeah hes tah.. mums into ****** dads into *****... hurh?

emm ah nahh...

ah.. homer & epa. :)

anyways, gday mate !

toodles..

thank u daddy

thank u ahma

as usual

no thank u mum

seriouslyyyyyy

geeezzz..

i seriously do have issues with u

grrrrr !

internet sux for the time being !!! grrr

n yeah.. very unbelievable aitee ?? well i myself cant believe it too..

hahhaha..

wait... i wna do unbelievable stuff to ya know...

its unfair tht ur doing it, but app im not..

so.. yeah..

:)

just enjoy it..

hold on to those sayings..

u can do it !

n plus..

the sayings..

its so fucking true..

:D

say it (=

It's all about steam
It's all about dreams
It's all about making the best out of everything
You'll know when your fine
Cause you'll talk like a mime

You'll fall on your face
You get back up and you're doing fine
"a considerate clown, a preachy preachy machine"
Is one of the sweetest things you would say about me
But I don't have the time for your distorted esteem
Why are you toying with my mind?


I don't wanna hear you say it


Now you're fucking with my pride
You think you're smarter than me
Well everyone knows you will never be smarter than me
That's how it goes
I gained forty pounds because of you
Was there an "S" on my chest

Well I confess, you were too much stress
I'd have a heart attack at best
So now I breathe it out, I breathe it out
I spit it on the crowd cause they lift me up, they lift me up, they lift me up
When I'm feeling down
What am I spitting out? spitting out, something we never talk about
It's called my... mind


I don't wanna hear you say it


Now you're messing with my pride
I'm sick of standing in your line
So now you'll have to take it

Take this to heart
I will never let you fuck me over
Stop talking down to me your war is old
Your game is over
So here's my coldest shoulder


I don't wanna hear you say it


Now you're messing with my pride
Something we don't talk about
Something we never talk about

did i just see that again ?

geeezz.. i hope not..



:)

i am so sorry..

i cant keep on looking at it

(:

it keeps gettin better, after one comes another..

thanks mum.. thanks dad..

i realllyyyy love u guys..

n yeah.. no tx for going to pg tday..

n yes.. i wish i cud sleep for the next 24 hrs..

do you know why it happened ?

nooo... of course you dont know why..

but you... ?

its so a different story..

and i just dont get you..

at all..

YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

AWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you shut your mouth !

how can u say !

love spit love

seven pounds is oh my god ! geeezzzz

n.....

will i ?


okeh.. yest was er.. idk y.. evrytym i go to alor star bad stuff will hpn.. like seriouslyyyyyyyyyyyy.. no kid... but i got a bag n waitin for a kebaya.. its wite again.. n my mum jz realized tht act aft pmr wile waitin for results u can act get a job.. tis chic i met her, shes 15, has red higlites, kinda hot.. hahahah.. jz few incehs taller than me n shes gettin paid 600 bux.. how fucking cool is tht.. so now i really felt like i just wasted my effin 3months just like tht.. ive bin wonderin.. well i know startin from dec im into muvis.. then rite aft pmr wat was i into act ? i cnt rmb a ting.. i know midd november was games.. n bit of muvis.. but then bfre? geezzzzz....

sobs... well i know i cant get bec the time rite.. huhu... so nxt yer.. rite aft well final year exams, start tinkin of sth to do.. like... get a job !

n its cool tht someone is kind enuff to rmb bout me n pity me n plans to bring me out somewer.. n its at least gud tht mum knws tht im literally dieing bit by bit at home coz of boredom.. she said ksian dia, dhla dok umah tiap2 ari, xbwk p mana.. - now u know is it ? btw, its just to late. i wont forget tis.. -

n yeah.. will i ? coz it still rings in my ears.. n images n scenes still pops up... not gud...

off for another movie..

:)

- i love my life -

what exactly do you mean ?

- names would be indicated as *
- the gender wudnt even be mentioned

- again aku tersentuh... * n * family.. thank u.. :)
- idk how to go into dtails.. brains not working so good.. m into sugar againnn ! shittt !


1. *... tht persons name... i use to rmb * give me suprises.. wen i get back from school.. * idk.. food.. niceeeeeeeee fuddd....open the door for me.. bising2.. bug me around.. wthout * life is well quiet n lonely.. like it is kinda now.. well not really la coz i jz dont care to feel it anymore.. tho i dont contact * anymore, yeah why rite ? i dont contact penang peeps too.. i just dont want to.. it sux.. but * is well il rmb * till i die.. haih...

2. tho * lost my favourite mechanical pencil.. haahhaha.. pencil ja pown.. no big tuh.. we did spend a fair amount of time together... we are close, close la.. see i cant really rmb wat i did with * coz i jz abandon it.. huhu.. tho yeah we still do talk to each other once in a blue moon.. but i knw... * thank u...

3. *.. bcuz of u, m lisenin to great music. thank you *.. errr... we were well together just for a period of time.. it sparked.. ahahhah.. thats funy.. faw only.. huhu.. i dont like that.. mostly thru onlining.. chatting.. i used to rmb how high i wud get if * was there.. il just chat non stop, crap like hell.. i miss going hy.. .like helllll... weneva * around, its cool.. i love it.. dang.. imiss talking to u.. i miss chatting with u.. i miss hanging around with u.. y we r not close anymore.. well i knw y.. smtyms i tink y m i doing tis ? is it realy worth it ?

4. * uuuuuuuuuuuu ! ppl say lotsa stuff bout u n me.. hahahah.. mostly u ! we use to sms a lottttt.. share probs.. n like u know i give u my opinions n vice versa.. we just talk.. we cud talk on the phone for hoursssss... about anyting.. its nice tho... i miss u.. n i cant accept that u wont be around anymore..

5. *.. haih... we use to be very close.. ppl notice it.. even my mum n dad realizes that i love *.. wow haaa... but then.. * tinks its bcz of tht.. n i tink its bcz of this.. bottom line is.. we went separate ways.. wic i m hepy we did.. i do feel sad but its for the better.. * much more happier.. just look at *... thres ntg more tht i can wish for *...

6. * smtyms i tink is tis rite ? did i do the rite ting ? patot ka ?

* smacks on my forehead *

* vomit *

without a paddle is fucking kick assssssss!!!!! hahahaha !!!

geeeezzzzzz..........

you shut your mouth !

how can you say !

step brothers bodo gilaaaa ! hahahah... ok ah.. mcm ngn pa g..

so yes i miss my beverly hills chihuahua.. nnti ah tgk..

nw its hanniballllllllllll !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ! lecter !!!! m so gona wtch u !

n i sket perutttttttttt !!!! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

n oh my godddd.......... ! shushhhhhhh...

i hope sth tht she said bout sth was just well a joke.. i mean sth to luff about.. its kinda cute anyways.. but i hope its not true.. its better if its not.. but idk y i feel its so true wat she said to me.. if its true, il start to wonder... a lotttt.. wat r u tryin to do man ? i dont get it.. i dont und.. i just dont.. i hope ur just joking..

glass house effect

movies watched,

1. rfbr
2. kungfu panda
3. 17 again
4. marley n me
5. slumdog millionaire
6. superbad
7. valkyrie
8. devil wears prada - again
9. simpsons - alwiz.. hahaha
10.romeo n juliet... gahh
11.bangkok dangerous - ok la
12.the mummy - ok la
13.national treasure - brilliant
14.hellboy- ok la
15.the dark knight- the joker is cool
16.behind enemy lines 2 - xbes.. the first was nicer
17.world trade centre - besa ja.. can learn stuff frm it. but rfbr is beta
18.tropic thunder - its oh no,, tah
19.transamerica - its weird.. but u cn learn sth gak.. but crap


to watch - perhaps -

1. transformers.. imagine aku xtgk g.. grrr
2. mr n mrs smith. sja syok2
3.without a paddle again.. ahhaha
4.vantage point..
5.seven pounds
6.casino royale 007 - xigt
7.quill... - idk wat.. all i know the cover is this goddarn cute puppy.. hahaha
8.hitler the rise of evil - coz valkyrie la ni
9.red dragon - hanibal lecter
10.silence of the lambs - hannibal lecter
11.hannibal - hannibal lecter
12.stomp the yard
13.200 pounds beauty? no idea
14.ip man
15. sawwwwwwww ! bec to horror n gore.. weeeeeeee :D JIGSAW ! i lurve his voice
16.happy tree friends ! i know its not movies but its like byk gila episodes yg kena tgk..
17.the owl - idk y its in here.. ni do u know the add at ntv7 aft the news. theyl be this pink goddamn fuccking cute owl wic is pink in colour with oh so oh mi god eyes. .i lurveeeeeeeeee it ! dulu wenva ada add tu il practically stop watever m doin, rush to the tv n watch tht less than 4 min short animation.. heheh.. and dadds like y r u into it ? it has no values or message or wtsoever ? of coz m like xpla. its jz an animation for fun.. n gz wat ! now hes into it tooooo ! hahahahah.. m so hepy ! hahahahah.. like last nite.. i was wtcn sth else.. then hes like aiman3 !! look at tht ! ahahah.. weeeeeeeeeeeee :)


n yes.. m so epy to hear bout daddy yest. ok so yest was saturday. went to work half day, then he went to juru autocity to tis dakar rally ? pa bnda tah.. al i know its a car exhibiton.. tritons, hilux all those pickups or is it mitsubshi? i pun xtau la.. all i knw.. he was so hapy.. ok he went for the rally.. yeah with a helmet on.. went in the car and the driver drove like maddd.. hahaha.. its so fucking fun.. n yeah he made friends.. - hahahah tht turned out weird.. - wel... m hepy he went there.. i mean.. its a huge suprise.. like imagine.. rizal going to like a carnival, crowd... - he wudnt evn go for sth associated with me or the schooll.. hahaha - hes so not like tht.. but app he knda did.. but yeah the crowd wasnt tht big yet.. so he went there n he had a blast.. he looked so hepy.. :) - tis shows that well he is into cars.. jz doesnt have time for it.. esp big2 cars.. i mean like camry like n trucks like.. tht wite monster.. he loves it vry much.. n even my mum.. shes into persona.. her reddy.. like.. gawddd.. they love their car so much.. -

oh n yea.. tnyt ada beverly hills chihuahua ! weeeee.. m gona wtch it.. tgk la ada pa g lam tv.. m gona wtch.. :) - aimans touching the remote control>>>>>????? its a miracleeeeeeeeeeee ! :D -


n thank u daddy again for letting me go out today again.. :) i bought well no b paid.. the glow in the dark tingy again.. i love ittttt... m gona buy moreeeeeeeee ! n bbbbbbbbbbbbbbb ! m so sorry i forgot bout the pick.. dlm keta bru oh shitt.. m soryyyyy b!!!!!!! so for tis... im gona give u two picks k ???? take it ! n diiiiiiii.. :) thank u for asking me out.. moha n pat.. muah2... ahahhahah... patricia is cool.. moha is cute.. with kisses on top.. hahaha.. thanks guys... at least yeah m not stuck at home.... m outtttt... but still.. i have wings... but they dont seem to flap n make me fly... its all in my mind.. :) il work it out.. worse come to worse at least il get back on my feet wen school starts.. :) pray to god.. i will :) n yeah.. learn mandarin in 30 days.. kah3 !!!! wey... no huang kia d ! well im never a pure one ! :P !

my stamina... like shilll.. seriously.. yest.. jz a quarter way thru i started to pant so badly n legs were killing me big time ! but i stil went thru.. half way thru.. m like.. can i make it home ? ahahaha.. i did.. thank god !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) n yeah.. it did a gud job yest.. :) another fuhhh....

semi- charmed kind of life !

n yes.. m addicted to fishville n cafe world.. i admit it okayyyyyyyyyyyy ! yest.. m yparents were shocked.. even tday.. cz i got up erly... jz coz to cek both those stuff.. two days ago i ltak alarm at 8+ to serve my ciken.. hahahaha.. then xbgn.. thank god trjga round 9 . n sempat.. fuhhh.. i was like oh shitttttttt ! my cikennnnnnn ! then tros bgn.. ... gahh... neopets ley? lupa dah.. ahahhah.. nnti2 la tuh.. oh n.. school... n results... shessshhh... m still tinkin of wt to ask if i get 8as... money or sth2??? if stuff,, so wts tht sth2???


so limit 4 or 5 movies a day... but a must is two.. hehehe.. like two daytime. two nite... cooolly d mooly.. :)

- when was the last time i blogged ?

oh n yes.. i enjoy tlking to yashni.. :) i enjyd it tht nite.. i miss her.. i miss evryone.. oh danggg...

- just say it !!! -

owh... i did not just see that...

what's the story morning glory ?

and after all, you are my wonderwall

menyesal aku.. y din i say yeah in the first place ?

who's gona care ?

whats the big ?

oh shit

hurghhh

idk y i shud be so well yeah get angry over tis.. but...


ok.. situation.. as usual.. we r like eah opposites...


so yes.. i did luk thru my closet n clean it up.. * pats on my ciks n shoulder *


buttttttttttttttttttt.......... nooooooooooooooooo.... instead of tht...


shes like why r u giving tis, wat penat umi beli ja... bla3

mostly ungkit la apa lah.. as usual..

m like wtf is up with u man ! i mean.. ok... mula2.. u suka beli bnda yg i mmg xsuka.. n u alwiz ask me to do or like tings wish i HATE ! yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ! n like tings that il never like bnda tu lah yg u dok encourage buat.. bnda yg i suka dakkkk.. tu lah.. apa yg boleh to her pun idk la wat.... so ok...

she ckp i dont appreciate it so thts y m giving it away.. fuckkk... u yg asked me to set aside.. n i didddddddd ! mula2... u beli bnda yg i dont like.. u bot it without asking me.. n of coz, for sure bnda yg u beli for me is sth tht is nt my interest.. like mmg i xsuka or x minat lgsg... u see.. taste very the very diff.. then shes blamming me m not wearing it suma.. y sud i fuckingly wear it if i dont even like it.. mind u ! i dont even want it ! i din even ask for it ! n now shes blamming me.. sayin its a waste of her money - wic fckingly i knw its not ur money ! - x appericate la suma.. n she says she doesnt wana buy me stff anymre.. she ckp she dah serik.. m like wtf is wrong with u! ok tgk ah.. nwadays.. the stuff tht she buys i mean il choose it myself.. ada aku pakai ka x ????? yaaaaaa ! aku pkai !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lantak ah.. idup aku dh mcm ni.. lagi la i ask for stuff.. m so sorry...

then she dok nk simpan lagi benda tuh.. dh i dont wear kan.. bg kat org la.. simpan 40 tahun pun aku xpkai.. bek bg org.. bkn aku msok tong smph ! tu lah.. ang kan.. beli banglo nk sumbat barang ang pun x cukup.. pstuh dok bising kat aku... p la..... im like y sud we kip it, its nt tht m gona wear anymre.. i have others to wear... - others that i like.. thts y u alwiz see me wearing the same ting coz yg len aku mmg xsuka.. xsukaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ! -

ish... mmg wen she dok bising2.. my god.. my face was like burning like hell.. kalo bole time tu aku dh jerit dkt muka dia ckp mcm u dh la beli stuff yg i dont like, ur sayin pulak i dont appericiate it, wat do u xpct me to do ! then blame me pdhl i din even ask for it... tpi nseb bek.. still bole control.. the whole time i jz played guitar.. kah3.. she dok bising sorang2 dia n i jz wt muka bodo n pekak.. lantak p kat ko la.. aku mls nk layan.. yg aku tau.. ive done my part of cleaning up - wic in her case, it wouldnt even be in her dreams.. - n ive set aside stuff to be thrown n given away..

* pats on my shoulder *

grrrr

at least i have done sth..

and then... xcukup tuh.. aku xtau la apa lagi......

bes gilaaaaa.......

awat cuti skola ni mcm trok gila babi.......

dhla dgn x p mana......

dgn x buat apa....

aku xtau nk kata paaaa.....

- i wont forget this -

what the fuck is wrong with u !

i dont know why, in all the human beings in tis fucking world, MUM !

u must be the one who i have constant issues with.......

WHYYYYY !!!!!!!!!

sleepy head..

ish... y................ must everytime im about to do sth better like wtch a muvi or sth mum wud b like aiman do tis do that.. wen im staring at the fucking freakin four walls or bored to death she wudnt say a single damn ting...



i say WHAT THE FUCK ! ! !

can u read my mind ?

i haven't heard one thing that you have said,

this whole time you were talking,

i was too busy picturing you dead .

take that - patience

capo n metronome anyone ?

so yeah... my left fingers are fuckingly painfull.. hahaha.. well not that bad but it is painfull.. kinda.. grrrr... so yeah.. m going for guitars.. kinda enjoying..i just need to get the right dudes, the right videos n the easy song n less complicated strumming.. n yeah the freaking chords... grrrrrrr... fingers.. y r u so long n big ???

so yeah.. i tink m being ambitious.. but hey... il just list em then il think of it..

1. avrils songs.. kinda ok.. yet to learn

2. iris.. idk itl be easy or not..

3. ur beautiful.. m learning it!!!!! n yeah.. almost ok dah.. jz capoooooooo !

4. unwell.. no idea..

5. some of rivermayas songs.. muahahha

6. wonderwal.. mcm dak.. since dia ada this power or bar chords we call it? wer it nids just a! finger to press like 3 strings or more or sth like dt perhaps ? grrr.. i can only well two oni... ishhhh

7. 21 guns.. its nice man... but imposib.. perghh...

8. nickelback... photograph is cool.. nnti ada g ah...

n yeah.. ada la byk lg.. but tgk la cna.. il ahve to go slowly one by one as im so slowwwww... so kena perfectkan satu persatu... sbr aiman sbr.. n yeah kings of leonnnnnnnnnnnnnn

n yeah. the padangs.. respect sial !

ok dhla.. oh yeah.. muvis.. i have lotsaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa dvds man... frm che ches.. nti la tu tgk..

haih...

oh n i can play more thn words.. but still slow.. sobs..

prctiseeeee....

FUCK

im starting to say fuck in everything again.. great...