It is not easy to start again. It is not easy to let go of things

If I can snap out of it, I would be very glad to do so and i would do it without being told to do so. If i can get rid of it, i would surely do it. I am not sure whether it is a matter of choice. Or whether it is because of anger and revenge and feelings that has been kept inside for long. I understand the need to be logical and rational but i dont understand well i just cant accept it. Simple as that.